Tri As I Might

And then there were none

2011-10-26T11:13:00.000-07:00

Considering the time taken to accomplish a dream on my terms, I don't really think this race report blog is late. So Lump it and quit your bitchin'.

"One and done." "Two and through." "Three and free." "Four and no more."

Personally, I think I was really still at one and done. My first three attempts at iron distance triathlons did not go as I had planned. Let me remind you:

The Bigfoot Triathlon, alternately named Jethro Throws a Triathlon. I blogged about this race several years ago and reread my descriptions a few months ago. I didn't do it justice. This was the worst organized race I have yet run. That includes all "Any Distance Classics" and the "Alice's Restaurant Massacre Run". I got food and drink at both the latter races.

Ironman Brazil. FUCK! Disassembled my bike, packed it, flew it to another continent, found it after some considerable consternation and time, unpacked it, reassembled it, and checked it into transition. Had to wait 10 hours to get to ride it back to our hotel as I pretended to be driftwood for 2:35 in the ocean. FUCK! And I especially appreciated the super-support I received from my "friends".

Ironman Arizona. 17:14:20. Don't worry so much about dehydration in the desert. OR learn to pee on your bike. Either way.

And so, #4: Ironman Texas.

I had a pretty foolproof method for this one. Train your ass off. Literally, I dropped 15 pounds before race day. Got plenty of rest, ate a healthy diet. Oh yeah, one other thing: throw money at the race. New gorgeous Cervelo bike: check. Private swim lessons: check. Ensuring Ed didn't let me get away with anything in weight training or indoor cycling: check. Multiple bike fits: check. Clinical massage therapy: check.

And then convince your bestest friends that the most important place for them to be on May 21, 2011 is in Hellouston, TX....not eating, not drinking, not peeing for just a smidge over 16 hours. Perfect. I do regret not convincing Mom, David & Karen to come. Oh well.

It was an amazing day. I slept pretty well the night before, not nearly as many dreams as previous attempts. I was ready. The water was warm and extremely crowded, as you might expect with a bunch of panicked swimmers in a very little area. I got punched, shoved, swum over. I never really found that sweet spot where you're just swimming. This was due to yes, a much-improved swim stroke, but also one lone crazy-woman, who must have covered 4 miles in her swim. She swam the entire way - side to side. She kept hitting me perpendicularly, if that makes any sense. She could have won that damn swim if she'd learned to sight. At all.

My favorite part of the swim was the last bit with the canal. I'm still not sure exactly how far it was, but it was certainly longer than I expected. But I got to see and hear my peeps following me the whole way. And I got to hear the Vuvuzela. OK, I may have to re-examine whether that was my favorite part. I remain surprised that Annn did not end up in the drink at some point that day. Anita, Joy, J9, Adelia & Jackie must have been on some good drugs.

My swim time was about 30 minutes faster than IMAZ. That's with no extra swim effort - that's all technique improvement. Thanks to Annn for convincing me how awesome ProKaren is and to ProKaren for convincing me I could easily complete the IM swim in under 2 hours. How about 1:43??? Suhweet.

I immediately spent a significant portion of that time savings in transition. It wasn't like IMAZ. When you're in the middle of the pack, the volunteers are a whole lot busier. So, I had to dress myself. Doesn't that just suck? Who knew? Always difficult to get tight fitting bike clothes on a damp body. Oh well.

Then I foolishly allowed volunteers to put sunscreen on me. Yes, sunscreen was a good idea. But these folks had lathered up their hands with the gunk awhile ago and it had formed more of a glue than a lotion. Great race pictures that resembled the Wicked 10k the year before. Did not know I'd be biking in my zombie makeup.

And then I went out and had the best 80 mile bike ride I've ever had. Best on so many levels. Smooth roads, great pedalling, passing folks on every small up and down hill! Staying hydrated, but not over-hydrated. Got stopped by a cop for 3 minutes (along with some of my much less happy racing friends) for traffic. 3 minutes is a long time. Like the difference between a sub 16 hour IM and not. Thankfully, not the difference between under 17 and not. Still, I didn't care. I was averaging between 16 & 17 mph and was able to stay in aero without the significant discomfort that I'd felt on EVERY OTHER BIKE RIDE I'D EVER TAKEN AS AN ADULT. I love it when a plan comes together.

Anita & her entourage were supposed to try and stake out the bike course at about mile 35. But I was too fast. Ha! Yes, I'm chair-dancing in victory knowing I was going too fast on my bike. What I did not know until much later was that this panicked Anita because she thought I was going to burn out. But Annn was able to talk her down from the ledge as we had discussed strategy for months. And we'd decided I should just go. Not crazy effort, but a sustained push as long as I could. We knew to expect a steady headwind all the way back into town, so ride whatever tailwind for all I was worth.

The gang caught up with me about mile 50 and it was really good to see them. I managed to avoid wiping out as the girl in front of me slowed way down for the turn as I was waving to the best support crew ever to show up for a race. I was about an inch from clipping her tire and had to apply the brakes an a strenous manner (aka nearly skidded out). Didn't mean to give Anita yet another heart attack. But I was much too busy trying to decipher Annn's signs and find my Where's Waldo friend, J9, who kept hiding on me all day and then popping out in surprise. It was good to see that everyone was still smiling (and screaming and jumping and yelling). I was having the time of my life.

At IMAZ, I probably got off my bike to pee at least 6 times. At IMTX: once. Which was a really good thing, because my biggest pet peeve was that there was a line at every portajohn all day - there were not nearly enough. I waited for over 5 minutes at mile 70 on the bike. And when the volunteer came out of the extremely foul restroom after that 5 minutes (when there were other facilities available to non-racers) I almost peed on him. Asshole. So, 5 minutes is the difference between a sub 16 hour, blah, blah, blah....

So I had the best 80 mile bike ride ever. But gee, CJ, isn't the IM bike 112 miles. Why, I'm glad you asked that. Yes, there were 32 miles left after my best bike ride ever. Mile 81-100 was on the worst pavement I've ever driven or walked on with awful traffic and no shoulder to speak of. It was scary and I understand that at least 2 bikers were actually hit by cars in this stretch. There is a rumor that one of those accidents caused a detour on the bike course and many bikers actually completed 114 miles or more (yes, my bike computer showed over 114 miles). Do you know what the time difference it took to ride those extra 2 miles was? It's the difference between a sub....whatev. So those were a rough 20 miles.

And my trusted friend, my 5 lb. watch, crapped out at mile 84 of the bike. WTF? I'd used it for 6 months and it was always perfect. Turns out, the memory was full. I never did manage to read the accompanying manual and thought I was transferring the data from watch to Mac after every use. Nope. I was copying. FUCK! Can't exactly learn how to program my watch biking down the road.

And then we came to the sign that brought us back into "The Woodlands". Home sweet home. WHoopeee!!! Maybe the bike course is short? Certainly, the pavement was better....but those were the 12 longest miles I have ever experienced in a race on a bike. Every corner looked like the turn for transition and none of them were. I kept telling myself to stay focused. Every 20 seconds when I realized I wasn't in aero anymore and I wasn't pedalling very hard anymore. Oh look, a golf course....hmmm...I like golf...Oh hey, there's Where'sJ9Waldo on the smallest median I've ever seen between 6 lanes of traffic. Hope she's OK. I must be close to transition. And yet the miles just kept ticking off with no end, not even at 112....

Finally made the last turn and saw all my very happy, but nervous peeps waving me into transition (except for poor Joy who was sent on the camera batter errand at an inopportune time - I am hoping she took some extra time to cool off in the hotel). Turns out Anita was a wreck because I was unable to maintain that 16-17 pace for the last 40 miles since they'd seen me. And they'd heard there was a wreck. Poor girl. Someone should have gotten her a mai tai.

End result of the bike: a much improved bike time and superior prognosis for finishing an IM in under 17 hours. Although, I didn't know what time it was....

Into the changing tent and again, no one to help me change. DAMMIT. What do these people expect from me. Anywho, got changed (slowly), got some water, filled all my shorts pockets with my preferred nutrition and headed out. I decided to try to fix my watch in the first mile, so drink, eat, fix watch, then run. I got some data deleted and started the watch again about the 1/2 mile mark. This was distressing to me because I never managed to get a real mile time for the rest of the race. It's probably a good thing though because I never found a pace on the run.

Let me back up a bit. I've never run as well or as fast as I have in the 4 months leading up IMTX. I actually enjoyed running. Occasionally, I'd tell Anita what time I expected to be home and I'd beat that time by several minutes without cutting the run short. I'd PR every mileage without pushing (OK, there were a couple of races I pushed at the end). So I was expecting my best IM run ever.

Uh...no. Well, actually, yes, I think it was my best IM run ever. For the 4-5 miles I actually ran. Which were not consecutive. Nor probably even miles. However, did I mention it was hot? I mean MF'ing hot. Like, the second I got off the plane I turned to Anita and said "Oh, I didn't know. This race is totally going to suck. And not in a good way." The heat was another factor in the last 30 miles of the bike. It had been overcast and a little rainy earlier in the day. Still hot. HOT actually. I don't know how hot. But it got muggy AND sunny in the last 30 miles of the bike.

And then they expected me to run. There was about a mile, maybe 1.5 miles of shade on the run course. The 3 look 8.x mile course. And sunset was after 9pm. Hot.

OK, so after I got my watch reset, I started running. I noticed it was hot. I poured ice down my shirt/shorts at every rest stop, which was every mile. Lots to drink. Cool sponges under my hat and on the back of my neck. Still hot. Felt woosy pretty early on. Digestive issues early on. I slowed down. OK, CJ, get it together. No problem. This is a long race with lots of recovery time available. Change up nutrition/hydration, slow down until you feel a bit better. Until I can think again. Hmmm. Managed to get through the first loop. It was hot and slow. Anita was worried. Joy asked me what my pace was. I laughed. No pace. None. I'd expected to be able to catch some friends on some loop of the run, but I had nothing. I was only able to run a few steps at a time before I'd feel woosy again. Without the vuvuzela in my ear, I'm not sure I'd have run that much.

I started to notice in that second lap that there were a ton of bike paramedics on the course. And that all of them were very busy. Those that weren't administering IV's were on their bikes following folks they'd soon be putting IV's in. I realized that I could think - I realized that as long as I stayed vertical and moving forward, I'd be able to finish this thing in under 17 hours. No hope for the 15 hour goal at this run pace, but as long as my body didn't get a new piercing by IV, I'd have the monkey off my back. I also realized that though I'd finally enjoyed an IM (finally) that my body is really not cut out for it. Maybe shorter races.

I hope CrazyWaldoTrainJ9 doesn't really ever want to do one with me. But I'd be happy to cheer and train too.

Nearing the lights of the finish line, I was able to run. One of my favorite Teammates, Adri and her husband, ran with me for some of that last mile, and that was awesome. Helped to distract from the pain.

I never saw nor heard my peeps as I ran down the finish chute, but I knew that crowd noise was definitely louder than it had been for the finisher before me. And I knew that meant they were there. Still there. Sharing every moment of the battle with me.

I love you all.

United Airlines & Contintental Frequent Flyer Miles "Upgrades"

2011-08-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

So today, I decided that it would be worth quite a bit of cash and 120,000 frequent flyer miles to upgrade our 2 long flights to/from Europe. These flights were booked through United Airlines, though one is on Continental.

This decision was prompted by email receipt of a "change" to our itinerary from United late last week. I didn't see any actual change to any of our flights, but whatever. I did verify that all our connecting flights appeared to have sufficient time for a successful trip.

But then yesterday, I checked one more time to see what had changed. Ah, our seats, picked 2 months ago, had been removed from our flight from Munich to Newark, an 11 hour + flight. I got online immediately. Only seats remaining together were in business class or economy in the last middle row. I'm familiar with the last row and that booking is not a mistake you make twice. The seats don't recline.

I called United as that is who I had the reservation with. I discussed at length the problem with an 11 hour flight in seats that didn't recline after I had carefully selected seats. I mentioned taking my 70 year old Mom on her first intercontinental trip. There was nothing the agent could do. Conceding defeat, I chose 3 from the ~6 remaining seats that would recline, knowing we would now not be sitting together. When viewing the seating chart, I did notice that business class was practically empty. I asked about an upgrade, but my question was ignored as the agent found that when she went to book our new crappy seats, our old seats popped into the reservation. She said she'd email me the new confirmation, that I'd receive it in 5-10 minutes and was there anything else she could help me with. I got off the phone as quickly as possible.

No email arrived. I started to call again today, but decided that since I'd obtained a confirmation # for the Continental flight, that I'd explore their website and my ability to upgrade with miles & money. I transferred miles from my United account (looks like the first decent news out of the United-Continental merger) and typed in the data. I expected to then get a seating chart, but no, we've been waitlisted. Waitlisted? But why, Business Class shows as practically empty. I read the fine print. Once waitlisted, the airline can wait until 24 hours before the flight to honor the upgrade. If anyone with a higher "status" than me wants a seat, I'll get bumped, regardless of how long we've been on the list. There is no way to identify what the list looks like. I went ahead with this anyway because, hey, it's my Mom's first trip to Europe.

I see that Continental not only charged my credit card for the full $s of the waitlisted upgrade, they also charged a mystery $1 pending transaction. WTF? So they get to keep my money for 3 weeks while they decide if I'm worthy. That blows.

So, OK, I know United is better than this. So after much contemplation, I decided to use the remaining balance of my miles and cash to upgrade the long flight to Europe. United isn't only not better. They didn't even tell me I was waitlisted or what that would mean. I hit upgrade and boom, my miles are gone and I don't get to select my business class seats, because again, they have the honor to see if they get a better offer. So far, no charge on my credit card, but I have noticed that United is not timely about credit card charges in about 1/2 the cases.

So Continental and United, I have to ask: what are you thinking? Now it doesn't matter if you're first to purchase an item with limited availabilty. You have to wait in the back of the line to see if any people with a higher class want that item. This doesn't seem like the American way.

Carytown 10k

2011-05-15T09:52:00.000-07:00

This morning was my last real run before IMTX. The mud crew re-assembled in Cary Court (why the hell didn't Joyless run either of these races?). Got to see my buddy, Denis, who is now in the 70-74 age group - how the hell did that happen? He asked what pace I was planning and I let him know it was SLOW and that he'd want no part of it. Even if I was planning on running this as a race, I'm pretty sure this 70 year old would have kicked my ass, even after 6 months of heavy training. Oh well, good for him, right? It was really good to see him though.

My original plan for the race was to run with Bike Coach & The Saint, but their plans changed Sunday when BC recognized that the hip pain she was feeling was being aggravated every time she ran. So, their run turned into a walk-run. I'm not sure how it happened, but I lost J9 within 3 seconds of the start. Never saw her at all. C-YA.

KG & I ran together and we talked about the pace I needed to run. Between 11:30s and 12:00s. Seriously, no faster. Didn't exactly go as planned. We ran just under 11's. Ok, that's pretty close. At the water stop at mile 2.5, KG needed to walk and slow down and I was feeling good, so we split up. I am extremely familiar with pushing hard to keep up with someone and then needing to rest. It's a bad feeling to know your slowing someone down (though it would have been good for me to be slowed today), so I took off down the road.

I picked up the pace for the rest of mile 3 and finished with a 10 minute mile. Not in the plan. I really didn't feel like I was pushing the pace at all. I decided to run whatever felt good. 10 cent head, I know.

I felt really good and really strong, so I pushed it, just a bit. Heard and saw Joyless in front of her building and she ran in flip flops for a block with me. Not sure how I feel about her being able to easily keep up in flip flops on a pace where I'm pushing it a bit. Wait, I know. Bitch.

Finished with 3 miles under 10s coming in with a strong final kick. PR'd my 10k time by 6 seconds.

So, lessons learned. I really do have a 10 cent head. Most important part of my IM run is the first 1/2: I need to run slow and easy (OK, nothing easy about an IM run, but slow, for sure). I've been negative splitting all my runs all year and this needs to be no exception. That means sandbagging the first 1/2 so I have something left for the 2nd half. This is also reliant on the FACT that the 10pm cutoff to start the last 8.6 run loop will not be an issue. If that's an issue, then fuck the negative split for the whole marathon and just try to negative split the 1st & 2nd loop. AND stay in the moment. Focus. Keep the finish line/time in sight at all times. I'll have a whole lot of help with that - from teammates in the race to my 5 sherpas.

I'm ready.

5k Mud Run Marshalling

2011-05-15T09:34:00.000-07:00

Most of the team congregated Friday evening for the 5k Mud Run starting at Brown's Island. I was not allowed to participate as a runner as I'm supposed to cover myself in bubble wrap and sit very quietly on the couch until Saturday at 7am central time.

The race was not well-organized. Packet pickup was only offered same day, which was crazy AND we had a nice rainstorm in the middle of the day, so this caused some extra problems. The lines were HUGE and did not move. Thanks to the rain and the threat of a thunderstorm, a lot of volunteers bailed, so everything was understaffed.

I left the team at 5:30 to get to my marshalling spot, which was supposed to be in a field on Belle Isle, where I couldn't get into any trouble at all. Did I mention that a lot of volunteers bailed? The coordinator could man only the most critical positions. I got reassigned to the rock hop portion of the course. The EMTs followed me there and didn't budge - they knew if anyone was going to require aid, it was going to be here.

I had a great time, trying to convince people that the slimy route was much better than the jump over the crevasse of death. I've been told I was small and loud. Whatever. I did my job and tried to wind up the runners and remind them that this was supposed to be fun for them. J9 was kicking ass running in a wedding dress, complete with veil. I'm very sorry that I did not get to see the wedding dress in the mud pit. Bike Coach, Saint and The Brit came through my race spot shortly after J9 and I snapped a couple of very quick pics before they were off (down the slimy route at my behest). After that, I couldn't wait for people to get by my spot so that I could run back (gently, no ankle twisting here) and perhaps get to see my peeps finish or at least in their muddy best.

Sadly, but the time I made it back to Brown's Island, everyone was in the middle of changing. All I got to do was embarrass J9 (I didn't see anything) and snap some more pics. FYI, the Fuji waterproof digital camera is awful. We bought it at Costco on Thursday and are returning it today. Huge delay between snapping a pic and it actually taking. It would only work for the pictures my Mom takes (gravestones and empty fields where civil war battles once raged). It'd be really good for pictures of dead people. Fortunately, we had none of those on the race. Unfortunately, the race pics are not good. I can live with that.

One beer later, we had a lovely time.

Roll Your Own 1/2 Ironman

2011-05-15T09:16:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, I ran a 1/2 IM that I designed and ran pretty much alone. It was a good indication, I think, of how IMTX will be although I hope that my transition times are considerably less. I'd like to note that this race was better organized than Jethro's Iron Distance triathlon of 2007.

I started with a 1.2 mile swim in the Downtown Y pool. There are crazy people swimming lots and lots of laps at 7am on a Saturday and one woman doing water aerobics/treading water for at least 51 minutes. I prefer to sleep in, thank you very much.

After rinsing off the chlorine, I changed in the Y and then finished transition in the parking lot with Anita's van. 25 minute transition. Hopefully a minimum of 15 minutes longer than TX. I hopped on my bike and pedaled down to the start of the Cap2Cap bike ride. I was late getting to the Y and with the long transition, I missed the start of the 50 milers, so I started with the 25 milers.

This was a fabulous ride. As I posted on Facebook, I much prefer racing a ride than riding a race. I passed many riders. So many, in fact, that I caught up with at least some of the 50 milers, which felt like a victory. It was a beautiful day for a ride. I stopped for a potty break 1/2way and lost 13 minutes to the portajohn line. I considered peeing in the bushes, but just too many people. I also stopped to allow several women to admire my bike. I really am enjoying having a cool bike. I'm not sure if it was just that people were riding instead of racing, but I was passing people like I have been passed all my life - like they were standing still. THAT IS FUN. I highly recommend it. It may even be worth 6 months of speedwork. Maybe.

I found the zen on the bike. I averaged 16.2, which is awesome for me for a 56 mile ride. Elevation gain was a bit more than I'll experience in TX and I had a good headwind coming home, which is fully expected for the return ride in TX (56 mile of headwind. Ugh). The Bike Coach has provided me with some different methods of approaching the wind, mostly just to get out of my head, so really good approaches.

The last 2 miles were up Main St with lots of stop lights, traffic and even construction. That was ugly, but the hills were fine, shouldn't have many or any stop lights in TX.

Changing in the van resulted in a bit of a long transition at 13 minutes, but not too bad considering having to stow the bike and change inside the van.

And off on the run. This is when I realized I'd not put on any sunscreen, nor did I have any. So, new course - run home for sunscreen, water & a bathroom: perfect! So an extra 6 minutes or so for the rest stop at home and then back to Monument Ave to finish up the rest of the run. The Saint stopped me for a quick kiss and Low Ryder joined me for a few VERY warm & sunny miles on Monument, which was great. I kept ever mile under 12, which is the game plan for TX too.

With all transitions, a couple of unplanned and unTXlike stops and many, many phone calls on the run, I finished in 7:58:29. Conservatively, I'm sure that without the extra transition and 13 minute portapotty line, this time is equivalent to 7:30, at most. That gives us a IMTX goal time of 16 hours, with hopes for better than that.

As long as it's under 17, it's a major victory, right?

Last Loooonnnngggg Run

2011-04-26T06:43:00.000-07:00

Ok, technically, I have 2 long runs left, but once you've done 22, 13 doesn't seem like much. And that other run is not a training run, so that doesn't count in my countdown either.

Ironman Texas. 25 days away. Including today, because today isn't over yet, so of course it should still be included. Race numbers will probably be issued within the next week & a half. That always induces a nice measure of freakout. I believe I'm experiencing some palpitations even now. It is totally human of me to know that the rookies on our training team will be experiencing a much higher freakout factor any time now, right? Right? It's not mean, right? Right?

So, I have temporarily given up alcohol and very bad "food" with exceptions. I've been "off" alcohol over a week now (OK, I had some of Anita's coppertini Saturday night, but how can that count, it was 1/4 fruit juice). And off junk food for 5 days. Do I feel better? NO, of course not. Maybe later.

I started an iron supplement. Perhaps this is TMI, but since I'm practically alone here, I may as well mention why. My "monthly" "cycle" (quotes because at my advanced age, there's nothing monthly about what is barely even cyclical anymore) may coincide precisely with the race. That would be pretty bad news for me. One day to need to feel my best I may feel my worst. Advil is very bad to take during intense physical activity and that is the only thing I've found to ge me through that once really bad cycle day. So, I may very well be in extra pain and feel extra weak on IM day. We won't even go into how no one wants to go swimming on the first day. Anyway, I think the iron may be working because I don't think this time was so bad. But I was playing golf, not self-propelling 140.6 miles, so I don't really know.

Yesterday, Anita & I played in our first one day Virginia State Golf Association tournament. Anita played the first 7 holes in 1 over par! That's not only REALLY good for anyone I golf with, it's amazing for someone with a 28 handicap and at a course we don't know that is very difficult. Unfortunately, one other woman in our group, someone we don't know, started calling her a "sandbagger" and talking about how great she was doing, blah, blah. Just like the announcers at a baseball game jinxing a no-hitter or a perfect game. She was a turd and constantly doing things to mess with our heads. Very annoying. But Anita persevered and finished in 4th place (net). She was only 3 shots from placing 1st net. That was awesome.

I guess that's all I've got to share right now.

100 Mile Powhatan historical bike tour

2011-04-18T14:59:00.000-07:00

It just occurred to me that I didn't really see much history in my tour of Powhatan yesterday. I was too busy pushing the pedals on steep uphills and ducking my head from a vicious headwind.

For those of you reading this (Hi, Sweetheart) who think I'm just Debbie Downer, doom & gloom, I refer you to Saturday's post in which I had a lovely race and after party.

The ride started off nice enough - great roads, lots of friends and teammates participating. As soon as the warm-up 2 miles was complete for the peeps I started off with, they were gone & I had no hope of riding a wheel to a faster time. They waited for me a couple of time at stop signs/rest stops, but I begged them to stop as I just felt like I was holding them up so I could ride with them for about a minute before I lost them.

And so, I rode mostly alone. I was passed by every teammate & coach, which is fine, it's fine, I say. 2 lovely gentlemen who clearly had no other self-interest except time in the saddle, passed me on a hill and then slowed up so I could grab a wheel for awhile. I mentioned how awesome it was to be drafting and Gentlemen#1 replied that his wife called it "the wall of love". I loved it and them. After 5-6 miles of riding, I grabbed the lead, thinking it would only be for a few minutes, but I got in aero and somehow with the 2 guys riding behind me, we whipped through the wind to some of my quickest mile times for the day. I'd call it the torpedo of love if that just didn't sound so dirty. They rested at the 30 mile pit stop and I went off alone. Never saw them again, I think they opted for a shorter ride, it certainly wasn't because I was setting any speed records.

Lots of hills. Rocky Ford Road. I yelled "wheeee" as I rolled down the hill, promptly followed by "fuck" as I saw the uphill afterward. I finished that hill in my easiest gear and barely made it over without falling over.

Wind. Was. Brutal. I have no idea of the mph. I know it called for 10 to 20, but it at least felt like a headwind for 90 miles. Even when it changed direction, it wasn't from the rear except for a few lovely miles near the end of my ride. REALLY hope TX has a calm day while I'm on my bike (or 112 miles of strong tailwind) and then a nice breeze for the run to cool us off a little.

Things I saw:

Lots of roadkill
One area of blood splatter with no roadkill in sight. This was when I started thinking of "Deliverance" as I was all alone out there in the Powhatan woods.
A seatbelt with buckle
What I hope was an air rifle. I nearly ran over it.
What looked to be 5-10 abandoned structures, decades or more old, collapsing toward the road near a creek. This may have been on Giles Road, which I found fairly creepy. I hadn't seen a car or a person in miles & miles.

I talked to a street sign, but in my defense, it started it. It said, "Watch for turning vehicles." I replied, "I hope I'm one." It was mile 95 and I was ready to be home wearing my ice pants.

This was not a Zen-like ride, but I understand this ride served as a worst-case scenario for race day. Even if everything sucks on race day, I will persevere. I just hope it doesn't suck.

Bulldog 5k

2011-04-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

Neither wind, nor rain, nor sleet, nor...something, something, will keep me from blah, blah my appointed run.

It rained. There were a lot of children. Starting, stopping running sideways. Puddles, pollen, wind. My peeps were running with child, so I was alone against the elements.

Well, I didn't make it on the podium for the Bulldog 5k this morning, but I did PR it and let's just give some serious thought to how great that is because my old PR was over 9 years ago. And in checking the records back, I realize I beat it today by over a minute thirty. That's like an entire 5k in dog years.

Had fun watching the kids at the indoor carnival afterward, but truly happy the mic didn't work well for their talent show.

FYI, The Franklin Inn has a very nice brunch on Saturday morning for pretty cheap. And the bloody mary was marvelous.

Timecheck for Ironman Texas

2011-04-15T12:29:00.000-07:00

So, it's Friday. Fabulous. And another long workout this weekend. It was supposed to be a 90 mile bike ride, but thanks to me, it's 100 for the whole team. Yes, voluntarily. A few months ago, I saw that there was a century ride planned for this weekend. Support & a map for $35! Plus a pancake breakfast. What could be better. I mentioned it to our coaches and they agreed it wasn't a bad idea.

Well, it's a few months later and the ride is Sunday. That's nice - it means I have a kind of lazy day tomorrow if I'd like, though I need to do the 2.4 mile timed swim I skipped earlier in the week. But still, not a huge time commitment to working out on Saturday.

I'm not sure why I'm not looking forward to the ride. I'm in good shape. It'll be nice not to have 2 loops of a long course, so no danger of bagging the ride in the middle, which is always a danger if I see my car during a workout. Perhaps it's the weather forecast for Saturday - complete rainout with bad storms on the way, so no golf. With the after-bike run, I won't be leaving Powhatan until about 4 or a bit later on Sunday, so doesn't look good to get any golf in then. So no golf this weekend. Bummer.

But then, this post wasn't really supposed to be about the bike ride. In the last 2 weeks, the entire IMTXTG team has found calendars. As in Holy Crap, we have to race next month. Or what do you mean we leave for Texas in 32 days?

I don't think I'm nervous. Really. I'm excited that we only have 4 long workouts left before the big day. I'm excited about all the progress I've made through hard work, great coaching and buying better equipment (have I mentioned lately how much I love my bike?). I'm really very excited that I suddenly enjoy running. Let me type that again. I enjoy running. Last week, I enjoyed a bike ride. Flat out enjoyed. On the same day, I had a great swim. Saturday I ran 20 miles and never needed a walk break (yes, I stopped for water 5.5 times). The .5 was because there was no water where it was expected to be. Took .5 to truly establish that it was missing. And then Anita happened to pass us on her way to the golf course - way across town. She was nice enough to stop and provide us with water and juice, which she just happened to have in the car, like any good sherpathlete would. But I digress. I don't think I'm nervous. Excited? Maybe.

So, all systems go. All IM dreams have been positive. Positive!? Like finishing in 14 hours positive (not realistic without a 45 mph tailwind the entire bike ride so I don't have to pedal). Like running with other teammates who are still on the course after my finish (instead of calling them in their hotel rooms and waking their asses up, which I have been known to do in prior years). Like saying "hi Mom" to the live video feed as I cross the finish line (because, of course, if you finish in under 17 hours, there is a video feed to say "hi" to).

But still, today marks 36 days to race day. That's not a lot. I think I need some chocolate to wash that down with.

"Mobbed"

2011-04-01T18:33:00.000-07:00

Crazy new semi-reality show based on the flashmobs that have started to become ubiquitous. Howie Mandel finding someone with a secret and turning the reveal of the secret into a flashmob. Could be good. We love a good dance routine.

So the first episode was last night and the guy with the "secret" wanted to propose to his girlfriend. They made a huge, and I mean huge, production out of the proposal and it was a lot of fun and really very sweet. I was sniffling and crying a bit at just how sweet it was.

And then Howie came up with the brilliant plan to stage the wedding right after the proposal, knowing she might not say yes to the proposal and might not say yes to getting married right then & there.

The whole thing was awesome and I was really getting misty-eyed, right up until the actual wedding. Then I started sobbing, but not from the joy of how sweet it was. I sobbed because in 45 of these United States, I cannot marry the woman I've loved for 21 years. Not in my home state, not in Anita's home state, not in the state we currently live in, not in any state we currently have relatives living in.

And why not? To preserve the sanctity of marriage. Huh? Gay marriage is the biggest threat to heterosexual marriage? How? How is it any threat at all? How does your marriage effect mine and how would mine effect yours? Wouldn't divorce be a bigger threat? Latest I've heard is that marriage is for procreation. Huh? So my brother shouldn't have been allowed to marry? If that's the case, why are people so uptight about folks getting knocked up first and then getting married - maybe they were just making sure the sanctity of procreative marriage was maintained?

Anyway, a fucking reality show about production dance numbers hurt my feelings tonight. Happy f'ing Thursday.

Shamrock 1/2 Race Report

2011-03-22T08:40:00.000-07:00

What a great weekend with good friends.

Anita, CrazyTrain (J9's new nickname) & I went down to VA Beach Friday night. We picked up our race packets, cruised through the expo with just minutes to spare before closing & ate at Nick's restaurant (local dive on 32nd St). Nick's wasn't really very good (last time it was awesome). Not sure if we were just too late in the evening or not as hungry as last time. Anita had mentioned that she did not want to eat every meal at Nick's. Well, we managed to avoid it a couple of times, but we still ate there 3 times this weekend - it got progressively better.

After checking into the Marriott Courtyard on 37th street, we were disappointed to find ourselves on the 4th floor - we normally have the 10th or 11th floor. But whatever, right, no big deal, right? Actually it was a big deal. The beds were awful - normally they're great. Anita actually got a housekeeper to put an extra quilt on our bed and an extra mattress pad on CrazyTrain's sofabed. That lead to a very nice pre-race sleep, but Marriott will get a bit of an earful on the bed quality and low floor as well as kudo's to Beth the housekeeper who made the situation livable (the hotel was pretty much sold out Fri-Sat nights).

We were so tired on Saturday, that we decided to cut golf short and only play 9, which really was perfect. Had fun introducing CrazyTrain to golf - she is a decent caddy in training. I look forward to her soon to be ninja caddy skills. She was a better golf photographer, but now everyone says I need new pants as my 8 month old pants are too big. Whatever. Let's just see what I look like 3 months after IMTX - could be sitting on the couch straining the seams on these golf pants.

Had a sub & salad as my pre-race meal. That worked out surprisingly well for me. I think I might use that again. The team ate various things - there was way too much fried food on the table if you ask me - that'll slow you down for sure. Lots of pasta and sandwiches. Various degrees of comfort the next day.

So had a good night's sleep which was easy for me as this was just a training run and I needed to run 3 additional miles after the race (instead of heading immediately to the beer tent - very poor planning on my part). Yogurt for breakfast and gu's ready for the road. We tried to get in the Shamrock spirit with some washout green hair dye, but it just made our hair look dirty and greasy - can't wait for the race photo's!

And now for probably my favorite part of the race. The starting line is about 2 blocks from the hotel. How awesome to roll out of the room and hear the gun go off for the first corral start as we just come out of the hotel and still not feel rushed to get to the line for our corral 4 starts. Never saw DS, PH or JS before the race (they seemed to think it important to be on time to the starting line - I submit it was too cold to be outside until the last moment). CrazyTrain had an hour to her BIG ASS race, but still came outside to see us off and wish us luck. That was cool (crazy, but cool).

I start the race with Bad Idea Girl (BIG) and Anita and their pace feels great for the first few minutes. Then I start wondering if I'm lulling them into running faster than they want and I let them know that I'm going to move along. BIG gives me the very accurate reminder speech about the Long Slow Distance I'm doing today and that I'm not after a PR. That I should catch up to the 2:30 pace team and hang with them.

I meant to do that. Really I did. I caught up to that pace team and I got just in front of them, thinking that way I'd know if I was slowing down too much when they passed me. Had a beer at mile 2.67. I was really impressed with that. That is EARLY for a 1/2. So first beer at about 7:30 - going to be an interesting day. Next 3-4 miles went by and I just kept trying to find someone to draft as the headwinds were pretty significant and more than slowing me down, they were keeping me a little too cool. I never really found anyone to draft for very long. When the wind hit big, I'd head for the middle of the road and whatever pack was there. Then I ended up running through them and finding myself by one of the sides of the road. I think I crossed the road more than in any other race - not so much avoiding folks, but because there was no comfortably flat place on these roads. There was either a pretty big difference in the height of each footfall, or the road was very rough and/or stone & gravel filled. Kind of annoying, but not a large concern - just had to keep my head down so I could see the obstacles. We're 2 months from the big race, so NO INJURIES needed.

At mile 8, I realized I was more than halfway through and hadn't really given any thought to doing a negative split, which is always a good thing to try for. So I picked it up a bit, wondering if it was too much to manage for another 5 miles. It felt great. Let me write that again. I felt great - picked the pace up a bit more. I was very aware of the feeling that my turnover was faster than I'd ever been able to carry for any significant distance. Probably had something to do with the headwind now being a tailwind. That's OK. I know it's partly that and partly training. I think a big part training. Had another beer about 3 miles from the finish. Cool.

Skipped a water stop so that I could double high-five a long line of folks begging for it! It was awesome and fun. Made me feel like a little kid, just a bit giddy. Just after that, there were a couple of older folks not high fiving, but loudly cheering and another woman swinging one of those hand-clicky noisemaker thingy's. I still wasn't done high fiving, so I high fived the clicky thing and it made a huge noise! Made a bunch of us laugh.

A few minutes later, PH taps me on the shoulder and asks how I'm doing as we're just a couple of miles from home! It was great to see her and exchange some race reports. She kept saying how great I was doing and I let her know I was going to go ahead and go for the PR as I was running so well. She told me I had it in the bag and we parted ways - she looked strong too.

Had another beer about a mile from the finish (so a pr as I'd never had 3 beers during a race, keeping in mind that a "beer" in this case is just a swig or 2). Makes me nervous to grab a cup from guys by the side of the road, not associated with the Hash House Harriers (drinkers witha running problem), but I had to PR!

Making the turn for the boardwalk, a massive headwind hit, but knowing it was only a couple of hundred yards until it was more of a sidewind made it manageable. Checked the watch and new that I had the PR in the bag, so I started varying my pace to get in an open space for a good finishing picture - forgot that I had greasy grey-green hair. Oh well, I still have the PR: 2:13:13. A pr by over 5 minutes!

A great celebration followed as each of us had good races. BIG persevered when she wasn't feeling well for a lot of the race and lots of new PRs were established.

CrazyTrain completed her first marathon very quickly as we tracked her Lojacked ass on the internet. Sad to know that the updates were a few minutes delayed as we could have seen her at about mile 15 of the marathon. Stood there for 15 minutes before we realized there was no way she hadn't already gone by. At that point, it was too late to catch up with her with the road closures. We were very disappointed, so settled for watching her online progress until she was 5 miles out. Then we headed for the finish line, but only managed to get a couple of pics as she flew by for an awesome finish.

Much more celebrating followed, as it should have. We had a great time with great friends.

Sorry for the long report.

Training failure

2011-03-12T16:06:00.001-08:00

Last Saturday, I had a miserable bike ride. I was supposed to ride 70, but wound up quitting after 40 because I hurt so much in my ladyparts. Yes, TMI, I know. But it sucked. Amazingly, as I was cry/whining in the car on the way home, my phone rang. Now all my friends knew I'd be biking & running for 5-6 hours, not 3. Somehow, The Bad Idea Girl (oh, she may not like the new acronym), just knew that I needed her to call. I'd already decided that when she called to see how my ride/run went, I'd let it go to voicemail. But she blindsided me by calling 3 hours early. HTF did she know? One pep talk later, I understood that this wasn't a failure on my part, it was an equipment failure. I like that a lot better. Thanks.

Williamsburg 1/2 Marathon

2011-02-28T09:30:00.001-08:00

It sure felt like the right idea Saturday morning during indoor cycling. As everyone else was getting ready for there 14 miler after the bike, I was chilling. Until Susie & Rick reminded me of how hilly Williamsburg is and warning me that the 2nd half of this race was miserably uphill. Sweet.

Then Sunday morning, I realized there was no really good way to plan nutrition for a 1pm race start when you had to be there by 11:30 to register the unregistered peeps and it was an hour away. Figured on consuming plenty of Gu.

What I didn't know is that there are only 4 water stops on the course: at miles 2.5, 6, 7 (!), and 10. WTF. Can't consume Gu without water. So I had Gu at miles 2.5 and 7. I realized at mile 6 that I was starving. This is when I realized that the water stops were literally water stops. No sportsdrink, no fruit, no frills. Wow. That's hardcore. This race cost $50. The shirt is cotton. Water only on the course. Afterwards, I saw 2 water coolers & 2 sportsdrink coolers along with coffee, lemonade & beer. The water & sportsdrink were getting the most action. No one was near the coffee & lemonade. I saw bananas afterward. No fruit. There was a rumor of bagels, but I never saw them. So I'm wondering what my $50 paid for.

Anyway, it was great to ride down with a van full of peeps - I've got to say that going to races with good friends and having a lot of fun for hours and hours before & after races beats the crap out of just racing and heading home. Can't wait to do a race waaaayy out of town with a bunch of good friends....hmmmm... IMTX?

The race itself was good. DB, Patty, J9 and I all agreed that the goal was to start slow - somewhere in the 11 to 11:20 range. Our first mile was 10:15. Uh oh. We talked for another 5 miles about slowing down. We kept trying. But every time we'd hit a downhill, we were under pace. I don't think I was alone worrying about the road back - especially this very nice long downhill we flew through the Golden Horseshoe golf course. Only bright side was the very long uphill we climbed afterward would be a nice lead in back up that the ugly hill.

Bottom line is I didn't even know what my 1/2 marathon PR was before this race. I thought it was either 2:15 or 2:20. Thanks to Rick & Susie, I knew to put that out of my mind and just aim for the official results cut off of 2:30. I finished by my watch in 2:18:39 (and learned that my Garmin puts the course at 13.22 miles - what a bonus). Official results haven't been posted, but I crossed the line at 2:19:45 per the race clock. Later on I learned that my PR for a 1/2 was 2:28:54! Guess there is some good in training because I'm now faster than I was 8 years ago on a tougher course. How sweet is that?

Next up: outdoor biking after 4 months of indoor cycling. I'm very interested to see how that goes.

So far, so good

2011-02-16T15:27:00.001-08:00

Mea Culpa or whatever. I'm here now, so quit your whining ;-)

Training has been going well. Very well, really. I've dropped a couple more pounds - still several from my overall goal weight, but I'm feeling very fit. Very, very fit.

Training at Maramarc with Trigirls/TriQuest has been very good this "off-season". Ed has been killing us for both the weights & the cycling, which has been very effective. I think I'm faster on the bike (we'll know soon as outdoor cycling starts in just a couple of weeks). My running is getting faster, but more importantly, that nasty little voice that's ALWAYS told me it's OK to walk has been remarkably quiet. A new voice (I think it may be Annn and perhaps J9) is reminding me to push myself on the run. Feeling good, that's nice, but couldn't you go just a bit harder? Cool. I like that voice. I hope it stays with me for the IMTX marathon - I am very excited to take this "new" body and voice out for a IM spin, but also very afraid of bonking.

ProKaren has helped my swimming. I still need to find a Masters swim that I can be awake for and then not yawn through the entire workday AND that doesn't interfere with cycling. If you're reading this, please come swim with me.

I had a great time at the VA Beach 14k this weekend. Not so much the running - what a miserable course - but the company made up for it all. Would have been even more fun with our missing peeps, but still a good time. And we found a cheap, excellent restaurant: Nick's on 30th St in VA Beach. Doesn't look like much and the wine selection should be skipped, but the food was really good. So good that we went back for lunch on Saturday after having dinner there on Friday. Highly recommended.

Looking forward to the 1/2 Shammy and spending more time with my Peeps!

Hello Gorgeous!

2010-11-17T19:54:00.000-08:00

Is there really anything else to say? If I'm not physically committed to this race, God knows I'm financially committed. But happy.

IMTX is the perfect storm of a race for me. Flat, low wind, warm water & warm air. Perfect timing for work as I will be very flexible with my work schedule.

ProKaren taught me how to swim this week. Ok, not really, she started teaching me how to swim, but she seems just as excited as I am by the progress we made in 30 minutes.

Already doing Ironman Math. But for the first time, the answer is coming up in my favor.

Oops, I did it again

2010-11-03T17:10:00.000-07:00

I understand this is my new ringtone, because I did, I went & did it again.

First there was "one and done" then "two and through" then "three and free". Well, there's not a whole lot that works with the word four. Right now, i'm guessing the theme will be four and poor, because this thing is going to cost a fucking fortune.

Because I did it. I bought my way into Ironman Texas 2011. Moron.

I'm now told that I need a new bike. They didn't mention this before I paid for IMTX. Crap.

Wicked 10k

2010-11-01T17:15:00.001-07:00

This is on the MUST list for everyone who wants to run a 10k but hates to run. It cures all manner of ills. Even death.

running

2010-10-16T10:53:00.001-07:00

Anita & I have run 4 times in 2 weeks. Not far, not fast, but we've moved without benefit of a machine.

When's Ironman Texas?

Wicked 10k

2010-09-30T17:22:00.000-07:00

So, I guess I should start running. Or start working on my pre-race bartending skills - that worked so well for my last Va Beach race (or so I'm told).

Dragon Boat

2010-07-31T17:29:00.000-07:00

I'm on the board of Virginia Breast Cancer Foundation. I may be the only person on the board, living in Richmond, who has ever done an athletic activity ever. I got volunteered. Volunteered, which I am here to tell you, is ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY a word. Cuz it happened to me. Not just to be ON the Dragon Boat but to be Captain of the MFing (or should that be FMing) DB. Meaning that to make this a livable experience for me, I had to convince friends of mine to come spend their hard earned cash and spend there well-deserved weekend day in a tent down by the river, which I'm guessing is only marginally above a van down by the river. But convince them I did. If you're reading this and you did not row with me today, there will be a reckoning called 2011. If you're reading this and you DID row today, I'm afraid there will be a reckoning and I have no idea what it is, but I'm sorry and didn't we have a good time and I know you can't move, neither can I and it's really gonna hurt tomorrow, isn't it, and despite wearing bike pants to save my ass today, there is now a 5 inch blister on my ass where there was a 3 inch blister this morning. I'm an ACCOUNTANT. I freaking sit for a living!!!!! FUCK. Muffins.

OK, I feel better now.

Seriously, we raised money for a great charity and 12 of my dear friends & I had a great time and Annnnn and Thomas and Lauren and Harrison and Mom and J9 and Linus came to support us. And 5 of my friends manned the beer tent - if you don't think that's a great idea I didn't see coming, then you really need to think again. AND AND AND we had a great time.

We rowed too well in our first race which placed us in the B division instead of C where we really belonged, so we got blown out in our next two races, but that's OK. We participated in a breast cancer remembrance ceremony which was really cool and reduced me to tears. It was an honor to row Survivors around - very empowering.

So, next year I really do need 25 dear friends to sign up for this: 20 rowers at a time, 1 drummer (preferably someone under 300 pounds who understands the purpose of the task and has just a bit of rhythm), 4 alternates. We had a really good time, though I'm not pleased with the soreness/blister - if we practiced 2x beforehand, I feel we'd have been less sore.

So tomorrow it's major yard construction on a water feature for friends, visiting friends in the hospital who have welcomed baby David today, a viewing for a dear friend's husband who passed away Wednesday morning, and an evening of babysitting our favorite baby, Linus. I can't hardly wait until Monday so I can get some rest.

This post wouldn't be complete without reporting that one thing the Dragon Boat took away from us today was the ability to be with Low Rider in DC for her Dad's funeral. We were with you in spirit and when I tossed my pink carnation in the river today in memory of breast cancer victims, I thought of you and your Dad in addition to BC victims. We love you, Deb, and we miss you here at home. Wish we'd been there for you today.

NYC

2010-07-28T05:33:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, I read that Helen Hunt was going to play the stage manager in "Our Town" off Broadway. Unfortunately, it was going to be a very short run, so we had very little opportunity to get there and fewer free weekends to do it in.

Last weekend we were supposed to go visit friends in Abingdon who we miss very much. I tried to convince them to go to NYC instead of us going to Abingdon. Turns out they had also double booked the weekend, so I felt very little guilt in heading to NY instead of Ab.

So, Helen was why we went to NY this weekend. We flew up Saturday morning (don't you just love JETBLUE - no other airline measures up). We decided to go all green and take the train in instead of a cab. The train usually takes longer because you have to travel a long way out of the way to get the right train. This time it took a really long time. I'd say normally - 1 hour to get into Manhattan. We had been on the train 1:30 (construction delays, heat & heavy rail traffic) when we saw 46th street. Oh wait, our hotel's on 44th, let's get off. We get to street level to find we're at 46th & Broadway all right. That's in Astoria, Queens not Manhattan.

It's 105 degrees and there are very few cabs in Queens. We start walking to where all the big buildings are in the distance. Glad we packed light. Not light enough. I told Anita that I just wanted to check out the NY marathon course in case we get in next year. The cabs that pass us are full. Uh oh. Finally, a Towne Car stops and asks if we need a taxi. I check to make sure it's actually some sort of car for let before getting in, but once we're on our way, I notice that a sign says that this car can not be hailed from the street, it must be called for. Uh oh. Anyway, I ask the price and it seems very reasonable, especially when we get caught up in bad traffic and take forever to get into Manhattan.

Do you get the feeling this could be a very long story? Are you actually interested enough to read it? why?

Anywho, we get to our hotel, The Millenium, which is amusing in itself, because when we decided on this hotel, Anita & I both had the Westin in our minds. We walk in and luggage and people are everywhere. Uh oh, our room is not going to be ready - standard procedure. The desk clerk very pleasantly asks if 1 bed will be sufficient for us. "Yes, but thanks for asking." We then asked about the gay pride discount we'd seen on the internet last night while printing out the reservation - 15% + tshirts. He said he couldn't change the reservation to that, but how about a free upgrade to the Premier. Now when he said this, we both were thinking "premiere", but no, turns out it's actually a physically separate hotel! It's connected via a hallway and past a theater. We still don't really know if it was an upgrade, but the room was very nice and on a very high floor with a view of Times Square. It's on 44th St, we recommend the hotel.

So we dump our bags and wash up. It's already 2pm and most Saturday matinees start at 2, so we check our show time listing that Anita downloaded from broadway.com. 3 shows start at 2:30. Let's run to TKTS. Great - 50% tix to "La Cage", which we'd wanted to see, but no Kelsey Grammer in this performance. GREAT - he's a conservative republican, so f*** him (don't really know how socially conservative since he worked so closely with David Hyde Pierce for so long), but really not disappointed to miss him.

So we have 10 minutes until show time. Just enough time for a hot dog. Awesome. Still hungry? Still enough time to scarf down another one. For the record, if you decide to do this, please purchase gum or mints prior to entering the show. Sorry to our audience mates.

La Cage was a little dull. I swear they sang every song 3 times and not in a spectacular way. The gay anthem "I Am What I Am" felt more like a lullaby then an anthem. Best Actor Tony Winner Douglas Hodge (sp?) was marvelous, but he could not save this show. Anita & I both found it very draggy.

Since La Cage put us to sleep, we grabbed a healthy snack at a convenience store & went back to the hotel for a catnap before traipsing down to the Village to see Helen.

The theater was very small. I estimate about 300 seats, max. The stage was actually the floor of the theater and the seating was set up all around the stage. We had to walk across the stage to get to our 2nd row seats. SWEET. The seats were elevated (like stadium seating), so our eye level was right at the actor's eye level. I didn't really think anything about that until Helen came out and it felt like she was talking directly to Anita & I! I think she managed to make and hold good eye contact with every audience member at some point during the show. It made our hearts go pitter patter.

As the character of Stage Manager, she introduces all the other characters to the audience. She was introducing the newspaper editor and asked if anyone had any questions. Anyone? No? So she handed a question written on an index card to an audience member and he read it. Any more questions? That's right, she comes right over to us. I swear she was going to hand it to Anita, but recognized the dread fear on her face! So she handed it to me, the ham. I asked my question and tried to hear the answer (mostly I just heard the blood rushing in my ears, my heart pounding and my brain screaming that Helen Hunt just handed me this card). I smiled and nodded like I understood what he had said. She then handed me another card to read. This one had emphasis on it (underlined). Yes, I just made my off-Broadway debut. No, I didn't get a curtain call, dammit.

After that, we tried to pay attention, and we were mostly successful. In the last act, Helen sat down on the step next to Anita for quite awhile and was drinking a bottle of water. I'm pretty sure Anita has no idea how the play ended (just kidding). After the show, we noticed the bottle was still on the step. We didn't want anyone to trip on it, so we picked it up. That's correct. We now have Helen Hunt's DNA and P!nk's DNA. I really need to go back to school to learn what this may mean.

After the show, we learned that Helen will only sign autographs on items left at the box office with a stamped, self-addressed envelope and that she picks them up on Sundays. Yes, we dropped a program & envelope off at the box office on Sunday morning.

After the show, we wandered the Village, had a drink at The Stonewall Inn, site of the start of the gay rights movement back in 1968 via the Stonewall Riots. Then we walked up to Chelsea and found a "gay" restaurant called Vinyl. It had lots of disco balls & was decorated with old album covers. Guess using the words "old" and "album" was redundant. Anyway the food was good and the drinks were cold. Have I mentioned that it was 107 Saturday in NYC. Not sure what the temperature was as we walked around at midnight, but I can tell you we were drenched.

Sunday we got TKTS tickets again. Saw "Promises, Promises" with Sean Hayes & Kristin Chenowith. They were both terrific, especially Sean. He is a good singer and got to talk to the audience in character. Very fun. FYI, contrary to "Newsweek's" review, he was very believable in the role. It was a good & fun show, just a bit draggy in the middle. We both managed to stay awake the whole time ;-)

For the evening performance, we couldn't decide between seeing "Mamma Mia" on Broadway for the first time or seeing "Rock of Ages" for a 2nd time....we flipped a coin and ROA won...but then we decided to see which show had better seats - MM. Hmmm. Went with MM so we could know for sure whether we liked this show or not. We'd seen it in Richmond as part of the Broadway traveling show and it seemed like a middle school performance. Only 2-3 folks could sing. This is a MUSICAL people! Then we saw the movie. The only good thing about the movie was that we went in Tampa at the theater that served alcohol. Helped a lot. Watching Pierce Brosnan sing was akin to watching a train wreck. So, we'd never seen a really good, musical cast and everyone who had seen it on Broadway raved. We saw it. We never have to see it again, so that's a positive. It was OK. But the audio and the voices were just so-so. We couldn't even hear the lead 1/2 the time. Not Broadway standard, but the rest of the audience seemed to love it. I'll take the Broadway cast recording and enjoy that, but I never have to see another production of it.

A lovely meal at "Junior's" afterward where Anita got a little tipsy and giggly. Had to carry her back to the hotel, fortunately it was only 2 blocks and I've been working out.

Shopped on Monday and then flew home. We really enjoyed the weekend.

Funny thing happened on the way to triathlon

2010-07-19T12:31:00.001-07:00

I was contemplating Ironman Texas 2011; I admit it. An early season tri would eliminate 90% of the awful summer training in Richmond. It would allow me to continue to play nearly as much golf as I want to in 2010. It would enable me to get the 14 minute monkey off my back and perhaps to even get on with my post-IM life. I thought I might even have company on the race and in training.

Then, I was reminded that my shoulder hurts and that I should see a Dr about it before shelling out $600. Then I was told that I would not have the company I seek on the race. Not in 2011 anyway.

Then I was reminded that we have a family wedding to attend in Florida the following weekend which may make vacation time limited (but who wants to vacation in Houston anyway).

Then I was reminded that I pretty much suck at swimming, biking & running.

Then I was reminded that I pretty much hate same.

But that monkey is still clawing. I received permission to do the race. NO, you don't need to know from whom. But please don't tell my mother I'm considering it. I think she knows, but she's pretending blissful ignorance and that works for us.

I've looked at the race website every day for a week. I've got the phone number for a great Dr for my shoulder and certainty that an appointment would be expedited (oh yeah, did I mention my health insurance currently carries a $6000 deductible I really was planning on not spending)?!

Anita wants me to lose the monkey. She doesn't find it attractive, though she tries to hide that fact. She'd like me to do IM TX 2011.

And then yesterday, we went to support a friend at a tri. I was overcome with a sense of, well, not calm, exactly, but a sense of "whatthefuckwasIthinkingIhatethisfuckingsport", which pretty much is as close as I ever get to calm. I was certain the monkey was gone.

I looked at ironmantexas.com again today.

Is there a 12 step group for this?

VBCF Memorial golf tournament

2010-07-17T16:17:00.000-07:00

Had the Barbara Edwards memorial golf tournament this morning. Proceeds benefit VBCF, which is a great organization that has done a lot for breast cancer education & advocacy in VA and even nationwide. I've been involved with this organization for about 6 or 7 years now and I am very proud of the work they've been doing.

It was really hot today. I'm hoping it's a lot cooler at the Dragon Boat races in 2 weeks. If it isn't, I'm guessing I'll be rowing that goddamn boat alone.

Golf

2010-07-11T14:46:00.000-07:00

We did not win. 2nd place felt pretty icky. And I have no idea how they worked the handicapping system to place us in 2nd, though I'm sure it was fair. Just very odd.

Anyway, now I'm going to branch out into some "other" activities (still lots of golf), but try to get back in shape. Anita & I have been dieting for about 2 months and have lost quite a bit of the weight we wanted to (still have a ways to go, but more exercise will help with that, even if we have to eat a bit more, right)?

Had a "nice" ride in WC today with an unexpected guest star. Feel like I actually learned something about hill climbing, but certainly not all I need to learn. Legs still suck (imagine that) and lungs had a hard time sucking enough. Baby steps, right?

Had our 1st visit to a pool this year and very much enjoyed that and hanging. Can't believe we had to drive to nearly another state, but whatever. Took like an hour to get home, where I ate and then collapsed for hours. So much for fixing the fence today.

Was this the most boring post I've ever written?

Golf

2010-07-09T17:55:00.001-07:00

This has certainly been the year of golf.

Tomorrow we take on the EWGA (Executive Women's Golf Association) regional championship. If we win, we go to sectionals in DC where the competition is fierce. If we win there, we go to nationals in Wisconsin in October. Why would we want to go to Wisconsin in October? Because Anita wants to "collect" it. Ok, that's as good a reason as any. Let's win!

It could happen

2010-06-24T19:30:00.001-07:00

Anything is possible.

But what is probable?

Getting My Ass Handed to Me on the Bike. Again.

2010-05-02T08:23:00.000-07:00

I must be a masochist. I biked with my new coach again today.

Turns out I have no muscles. At least not in my legs. I'm not sure exactly what's hurting right now, but I thought it would be my leg muscles. Fat doesn't hurt, right? No nerve endings in fat, right? Guess I need to start learning anatomy too.

We stayed in West Creek this time so that Coach could yell at me for more sustained periods without being flattened by a car. I must enjoy the personal attention because I don't think I cursed once. That's a new experience for me on the bike. I did better on the hills and perhaps even better on the flats. My legs are definitely feeling it as were my lungs at the time.

Bet I've just saved all my cursing for tomorrow when I try to get out of bed.

Thanks Coach.

Getting My Ass Handed to Me on the Bike

2010-04-27T16:51:00.000-07:00

I have obtained the title of my blog from a liar. LIAR.

You know who you are. You are not slow on the bike. You are not less than graceful (you blew right through the Cap One gates). You enjoyed torturing me.

I am definitely getting the Gattaca surgery. Definitely. But arms and legs I think.

Stupid game.

In unrelated news, if my handicap drops to 18.4 by June 1, I can compete for the USGA amateur championship as long as I don't buy a membership to a private course (not a lot of danger on that last part).

Oh wait, instead of playing golf, a game I'm pretty good at, let's do Mighty Man. It'll be great - we'll drive for like 16 hours and I'll miss the swim time cut off. GREAT. FABULOUS.

I'm not bitter. Really. I'm just disappointed. Damn genes.

False Alarm

2010-04-11T19:19:00.000-07:00

Turns out we didn't get into the NYC marathon. Turns out when you order products on your credit card, they have a tendency to put it on your credit card. Weird. Guess I'll have to keep track of that stuff.

So, new plan. Disney for all of 2011. While at the Cherry Blossom expo, I had a chance to peruse the hardware of all the Disney sponsored races. Screw Ironman, those are some medals. Really, they're just metals, but still.

Can I get a woo hoo?

Just think, with no swim or bike in the event, packing should be very light. Except for maybe the golf clubs.

Stupid, Part 4-9056-222

2010-04-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

Either Anita or I got into the NYC marathon. Today I realized this was not a good idea.

Moron.

Loony Tunes

2010-02-17T13:06:00.000-08:00

I play Farmville. I'm sorry.

Today I noticed that when my jackalope (fictitious combination of a jackrabbit and antelope common to Wyoming) was ready to "harvest", it didn't say "brush jackalope" any more. It said "collect imaginary milk".

It made my day: www.itmademyday.com

I then realized how pathetic that made my day.

And so, Fuck My Life: www.fmylife.com

Only my work life, really.

Merry Thanksgiving!

2009-11-25T15:19:00.000-08:00

To use Susie Q's lovely example:

Things I am Thankful for:

The Family I've Chosen and have been chosen by. I love you all.

The years we got to spend with Spot (I will....not....cry...)

Dear friends who come in all shapes, sizes & interests, including:

New friends
Old friends
Crazytown friends (you know who you are)

Rounds of golf where I don't feel I've gotten my money's worth (few & far between)

Good red wine

Dark chocolate

Thinks I'm less happy about:

Being a Farmville addict. I think I have a problem just because I don't think I have a problem - I can quit any time...and have.

The extra 15 pounds I'm carrying on MY ASS.

Knowing my job is ending, but not having a clue when, but I'm still VERY thankful to have a job.

Happy holidays & safe travels everyone (all 4 of you).

Race Report

2009-11-21T06:54:00.000-08:00

Short & Sweet: it was chilly to start, but fun to see all the dogs. Luckily, no one had a terrier that I saw, so no tears!

Who knew Stony Point Fashion Park wasn't flat! Up and down, up & down. Felt pretty good the whole time, but perhaps that was because i was running my 1/2 marathon race pace and didn't have to run a 1/2!

Great to see newly minted Ironman, Mary T. out there.

Way to go Anita for running her first 5k in a while. We're getting back out there, right?

And now, we've exercised enough to enjoy a Thanksgiving Roast Beef!

Jingle Bell 5k

2009-11-17T17:03:00.001-08:00

Come out and play with me Saturday at the Jingle Bell Run.

http://jinglebellrunrichmond.kintera.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=315549

Spotless

2009-11-16T16:39:00.000-08:00

We put good ole Spot down tonight. He was an 18+ year old wire hair fox terrier whom we loved very much.

We spent the last 8 years finding that the word "spot" appears in an amazing number of sentences & words & experiences.

When cataracts began to impair his vision, we put a tiny LED light on his collar to help him see. He loved his Spotlight (really fun was when we met up with his friend Maggie, who was without a light - Spot suggested her owners get her a Maglight).

He could always find us a great parking spot.

Loved his hometown of Spotsylvania. He was the mayor.

He starred in the movie "Spotacus".

We loved seeing Spot before our eyes.

X marked the Spot he loved to have rubbed.

With 8 years of coming up with Spot-related sayings, it about broke our hearts when we came up with the subject line of the email to tell our friends of his passing and the subject line of this post. The "spot" sayings always seemed so obvious in hindsight. Glad I didn't see this one coming either.

Race Report

2009-11-15T14:54:00.000-08:00

Yes, I use the term "race" loosely. However, the paper & the website categorized it as a race, ergo, this is a race report.

Big decisions prior to leaving the house: what to wear....hmmmm....weather report on Friday morning said clearing overnight, high of 64. Wow, excellent, t-shirt & shorts.

Friday night report: clearing by early Saturday, high of 64.

Saturday morning, 5am: Clearing by noon, high of 64. Currently: 48. Fuck. Oh and windy. Double fuck, but not in a good way. Ok, maybe by the time we leave the house it'll at least be in the 50's.

6:30am: 48, raining, windy. Sweet. Maybe I'll be the only one to show and I'll win money, but what am I going to WEAR to the awards presentation and on camera??? Ok, shorts, running pants, long sleeve race shirt, long sleeve very light pullover, gloves and bring a jacket until we get out of the car.

7am: Pick up Joy. Was that the sun? No, headlights. Fuck. OK, no sun, but we have Joy.

7:20: get out of the car...what to wear? Still with that, really? Ok, it's not really that bad. Take off the running pants & jacket. Leave the gloves & pullover. Bye, Love, yes, one more picture, great...gotta go - 10 minutes to race start and we're 5 blocks away!

Oh shit, it's cold, that is a biting little wind and now it's full on drizzling. Let's run!!!

I don't think my legs have EVER felt heavier than for the 1st 3 miles of the 1/2 marathon yesterday. Ever. Not in Jethro's Ironman at 2am, not in Ironman Arizona, not when I have actually had lead weights around my ankles. But Joy & I were troopers - we didn't mention how awful we felt for 3 miles. Even though it was raining steadily. Even though we had a significant headwind. Oh look - the 1 mile marker at 11 minutes. Damn, we're fast. We better slow down. Gawdammit - that was the 8k 1 mile marker - they started 2 blocks before the 1/2 marathon start. Ok, get back up to the pace we were at because we're right on 12 minute miles - that's perfect to start. If we feel good, we can pick it up later (yeah, right).

After 2 miles, we start mentioning how heavy our legs are. How, even though we've made a 90 degree turn to the North, we STILL have the same headwind (why is that always the way?). Wait, there's Anita & Stacey to cheer us on. Yay. And we can stop for a moment. Double Yay.

We continue up Boulevard to the 1st hill of the day. We make a command decision to walk it - after all, we're really very close to that 12 minute mile pace and we stopped to talk to A&S. We can make it up on the downhill.

I announce at the top of the first hill that the Blue Ridge Marathon is DEFINITELY out. OUT I SAY OUT!!!!

We realize that Annnn did not quite make it out to cheer us on or we missed her. Too bad, but no blame, it's a nasty day so far.

Oh crap, there's a turn I forgot about - stupid extra mile loop. YAY, Stacey & Anita - right after we decided to walk for another minute. Crap - start running to get to them. Yay. We have to run some more? Really? Dammit.

We see some friends along the way - Sharon, Ricky, Susie, Lynn - that was all good and we were running as we passed each one (OK, maybe not entirely running past Rick & Susie as it was a water STOP)...

Bryan Park Sucks. Best part about it was the apparently homeless man under the bridge cheering us on, telling us we were competitors and winners and that we were "doing" it. On the return trip, someone in our area called him the "Wise Man Under the Bridge". I don't know about all that, but it was the driest place on the course. The park course was up & down hills and I kept expecting a water STOP and there wasn't a single one in the park, nor for a mile or so afterward. And I did not see Angela who I had hoped to see there, but she's smarter than standing out in the cold wind & rain. She has earned additional respect for not being there.

OK, so onto Northside some more. This is where I have no idea of the neighborhood names or street names, but it was a very nice area. We continued to ask neighbors who were partying there if they could spare a mimosa or two. No one did and they looked askance at us. WTF - don't all racers ask for alcholic beverages? I always have. I heard somewhere that if you don't ask for what you want, you'll never get it.

running, running running...where the fuck are we?

Ah, a bunch of trigirls in a very pretty neighborhood - oh look there's Anita & Linda - so good to see her. Oh wait, there are a hundred trigirls calling my name & cheering. I tried to get them to cheer on Joy too. Then I was distracted.

I heard a little voice cry out in the night (OK, it was morning, but it was still overcast and it's poetic license for chrissakes, just chill). "CJ....do you want a shot of bourbon?" Bourbon you say? Well, it would be rude to refuse...SCREECH to a halt and take an immediate left turn to the girl with the glass. Is that a black label? Nice. OK, it was only half a shot and Cathy who handed it to me knows that this is certainly only for medicinal purposes. Smooooth. Didn't take but a second to catch up with Joy. I immediately informed her that although the Blue Ridge Marathon was OUT, the Bourbon Chase was definitely IN. Hello & goodbye to friends & loved ones and we're running some more.

Sure could use a water stop to chase the bourbon. LOOK, it's the Hash House Harriers - Drinkers with a Running Problem....serving beer. Um, it's only been about 1/2 a mile since the bourbon. Joy urgently informs me that "liquor then beer never fear", so I downed a shot or two of beer. Really important not to be rude. I'm just a social drinker. Really.

Oohhh, Drunk. For about 3 minutes. Everything is accelerated when you're racing. OK, now cotton mouth. Nice. Great - hangover. Where's the water stop....yes I was whining (preferred to be wining, but I don't think there's a rhyme for that)?!

YAY, water stop, downed my last GU and checked the watch at the 10 mile marker. We have a bunch of time to run a 5k and still finish in 2:45, Joy's secret race time goal. It's not a secret anymore, right Joy?

As we're running down Cary Street, headed for home, I can hear my ride approaching (always with the sirens). Ah, it's not my ride it's the )@&*$)@)* marathon winner. Dammit, I always used to try and finish the 1/2 before the winner finished the whole. Guess I have slowed down considerably, since this dude started 25 minutes after we did. Oh well.

Joy beat me by a bit - I just couldn't get my legs to turnover any faster and was barely able to keep my nose off the pavement. I know she wanted to finish together, but I hollered at her to beat her goal time. I was 4 seconds off. Story of my life, but a whole lot closer to the goal than 14:20.

Why does that always come up?

Here are 2 happy girls, right before they tried to walk again.

My Own Personal Hell...

2009-11-05T18:08:00.000-08:00

is having to shop in person for a baby shower gift....with a hangover.

The whole plan about not shopping online so as not to get on any mailing lists really doesn't work when you also forget to bring cash to the store and then have to use the credit card because you are out of time.

It helps a lot that the soon to be new mom is a terrific person.

But it still doesn't make it right.

Thought you should know.

And now back to our regularly scheduled programming

2009-11-05T05:21:00.000-08:00

So, on the hottest day of the year, back in late July, I struck up a conversation with Joy as we walked 9 holes. Anita & Stacey were smart enough to ride.

"So, Joy, how's the running going?"

"OK, good thing I can run inside on the treadmill. This heat is awful."

"What are you training for now?"

"Nothing really. I might run the 8k in November."

"Hey, you know what we should do? We should get Anita & we should all sign up & train for the 1/2 marathon in November."

Moron.

--- Anita wants all of you to know that she's smart enough not to have signed up for this, though she's run 3 times (that's just 1 less than I have). Ah....she adds that she is still pondering the race. ---

What...

2009-11-04T17:52:00.001-08:00

Too Heavy? Tell me about it - I'm living the dream.

I don't understand...

2009-11-04T06:17:00.000-08:00

This will be a long one. For my republican friends, I am pleading with you to read it. I am not intending to bash. I've learned a lot from the last 3 presidential elections and I'm really tired of all the bashing.

I don't understand the politics of hate. I don't understand why people need to find a group to blame all the world's ills on. I don't understand why we can't all just get along.

Instead of blaming a minority group (and how are white christian men really the majority anyway) for a shortage, why isn't energy focused on eliminating the shortage? This morning I heard of a conversation about how the Mexicans were going to use up all the healthcare and all the money. Really? Mexicans are that sick?

Election night 2009. Bad news for me personally. Maine voters decide they don't want homosexuals to have the right to marry as their legislators decided. A bit of a surprise to me, but I do understand that the subject of gay marriage is a polarizing one. I'm OK with it being that way, as long as your argument isn't that it's a threat to heterosexual marriage. If your argument is a religious one, I'd have to agree that you are entitled to your religious beliefs - but I also believe strongly in the separation of church & state and believe that government should stay out of the marriage business and way out of my relationship. How would you feel if your religious beliefs were in the minority?

In my current home state of Virginia, we have elected a governor that believed strongly enough at age 34 to dedicate an entire thesis to his belief that women should not work outside the home, contraception should be illegal, and homosexuality is well, the worst thing of all. But that's thesis is 20 years old and he says some of his views have changed. Virginia's new attorney general put front & center on his web page that he led the fight for amending Virginia's Constitution not only against gay marriage, but against any contracts between people of the same sex "to which is assigned the rights, benefits, obligations, qualities, or effects of marriage." That is so important to him that he put it front and center in his campaign. The newly re-elected lieutenant governor spent $25k of his own money to write this discriminatory language into the Virginia Constitution.

Virginia's governor-elect has vowed to overturn the current governor's first executive order, which extended discrimination protection to sexual orientation. He's saying this is because it is not a governor's right to make law, but if he agreed with it, I'm guessing he wouldn't have a problem. I can't look at this as an exercise. This is my life here. I'll be looking for a new job during the governor-elect's term. Fabulous.

I only came out of the closet at work when the original Virginia House Bill 751 to write vague law discriminating against homosexuals into the code of Virginia came up. I understand that some folks have a problem with homosexuality. I understand that some folks think my love is against God's will and they probably think they're trying to save me from that (as well as saving their marriage, which I really don't understand at all), but how can a contract ensuring I can care for my partner be a bad thing.

I came out of the closet at work because I consider at least some of my co-workers friends. I figured the only way they can vote for this discriminatory law is if they don't know they have a gay friend that isn't evil and that they haven't read this very short law, because this law is not just against gay marriage. I figured lying was worse than coming out: how can we be actual friends if coworkers ask me how my weekend was and I change all the pronouns or just say "we" a lot? If I say "fine" or "great" there are more questions. If I don't answer them, I'm considered anti-social. If they really didn't already know I was gay (duh), I figured that their discrimination against homosexuals was partly my fault. They deserved to know that a friend of theirs was gay and still not hitting on them (or their children or their pets).

I didn't choose this lifestyle. I didn't choose Anita to love (ok, my Mom did), but I thank your God and mine for her love.

I wouldn't choose this lifestyle - it comes with a full load of crap & baggage - people devote their lives to the eradication of my love for Anita. I REALLY don't get that.

For those of you that read this blog and voted this slate of elected officials in, I understand that there are many other issues on the table. I recognize the weakness of the democratic gubernatorial candidate. I also believe that many of you are my friends. I like to hope that you don't believe that my love is evil or threatening in any way - that I am evil or threatening in any way - if you did, how could we be friends? I like to hope that you don't think my relationship is any threat to your marriage or your children.

I propose this as a compromise: Go one step further than voting and a lot less than asking you to believe that gay marriage is OK: please call or email your elected official and ask them not to discriminate against sexual orientation in hiring/employment. Does it really matter if your accountant is gay?

I have another proposal that no one will be happy with - right or left:

Make marriage solely a religious institution. Your church will define it any way you like and I will have no problem with it. My church may define it differently.

Make civil unions legal between consenting adults. Allow me to provide for my partner both in life and in the event of my death or incapacitation. Allow her to collect my social security benefits in the event of my death. Allow me to file one freakin' tax return instead of having to complete 2. Allow us to purchase health insurance together, etc.

Children. I believe a child raised in love is a healthy child. You may believe there is more to it than that, especially when you find out that I also believe that the rearing of a child into a responsible adult has to be at least 1/2 luck. I will never raise a child, but I've seen plenty of children raised in rage and fear and hate. Most of these that I have seen have been in a "typical" family. Some turn out OK, some don't. I am no expert.

Thanks for reading. For both sides of this issue, if you care to comment, please do so, but please maintain respect for each other. This entire entry is really just about respect.

Stupid PC, Stupid MAC

2009-11-02T18:30:00.000-08:00

So, how can I blame Comcast for this? Damn, I can't - we don't have Comcast internet.

Why the fuck do people devote their lives to screwing with other people? What kind of reward do they feel for hosing up pc's? Yeah, there are financial rewards aplenty, I'm sure, but many of the turdblossoms (heh, heh) screwing with our pc's are simply doing it to screw with our pc's.

We have a MAC. We have a PC. I used an Apple back in college when they were the only thing around besides mainframes. It takes me a long time to adjust. I love my MAC, but I'm so ignorant about how to accomplish tasks that I do find it frustrating at times. I want to grab a single frame from some video I shot and use it as a picture....that was 10 days ago, so far no picture. But my MAC functions. I can surf the web. I don't have to upgrade my virus software every 3 minutes. Very occasionally, something will go kablooey on the MAC and I will watch it heal itself. That's right. No "did you try rebooting" advice needed. It basically says, "I'm sorry, could you wait just a moment while I fix a minor problem..." and then it fixes it. Without downloading the Encyclopedia Britannica. Without turning it off and on multiple times, often having to unplug it before turning it back on.

Our PC is infected. We have the latest, biggest version of Mcafee installed, in use, scanning regularly. Doesn't matter - infected - AND Mcafee didn't notice & didn't care. Fortunately, I have lots of former IT coworkers that know a lot about PCs. Some even still speak to me, generously forgiving me for still working for their former employer. So, I've downloaded a full working trial copy of Casper the Friendly Ghost's Save My Life software or something like that. had to uninstall Mcafee first because none of the virus software plays well with others. Mcafee didn't want to go - over & over again. You didn't really think that the uninstall & remove program would really erase itself once it was done, did you. Ok, I might have thought that. I was wrong. But Casper offered me a way around it and now, after seemingly half my life, it's installed and running. Took 17 seconds to identify an active threat. It's now taken 46 minutes to get 36% of the way through scanning the hard drive and has found 28 problems it is in the process of fixing. The estimated time to completion occasionally reads 3 days and occasionally reads 54 minutes. I'm putting money on 3 days.

I can learn how to use my MAC. I have 3 days to get started.

FYI

2009-10-26T17:13:00.000-07:00

It came from Australia first. Yay for Australia, my new favorite country.

Weekend

2009-10-24T19:29:00.001-07:00

This is my second consecutive weekend without seeing P!nk.

Today I consoled myself by golfing with AJ and Stacey and attempting to corner the market on Farmville neighbors, both real & fictitious, as well as four legged. I believe the four legged ones are real. We even now have a deceased neighbor. That one is a little over the line, I think.

We also stopped by Barnes & Noble and visited the P!nk dvd that will be released Tuesday...unless it comes from Australia first. I got to touch it, but it made the clerk very nervous. Can you see me throwing $20 on the counter and running out? Would that be stealing? Hmmm. May have to ponder that one some more.

And we spent some quality phone & FB time with She Who Deserves a Better Nickname Than I Have Currently Come Up With. Tomorrow we will plan the P!nk pre & actual dvd viewing party (may need to rent a hall, or perhaps break it up into smaller parties) and console ourselves some more by running with SWDABNTIHCCUW (Swadabn for short)....or at least planning a run and then backing out when I haven't had enough sleep because I stayed up hoping more FV friends will show (only 4 more needed - that's AMAZING). Ok, perhaps AMAZING is overstating, but 50 is a lot of FV crazies, I mean neighbors. Sure wish the cross out feature worked on this thing.

Then we will have Halloween rehearsal. I'm truly thinking we need to rethink our Halloween plans or at least our Halloween friends for next year.

G'night. Thank goodness I don't believe in editing before publishing, right?

In Someone's Footsteps

2009-10-13T14:51:00.001-07:00

I ran Sunday evening. About 6.5 miles with Anita & Joy (Ironannn had the kids, so no go there). We had a really good run and were just about 1/2 mile from the finish when I decided I really missed Ironannn. So I tripped, did a very nice somersault, and came up running, already reassuring Anita that I was fine.

I HATE scaring Anita way more than I hate being a klutz. But I've always been much more of an aspiring athlete than an actual athlete, so I should certainly be used to it, wish she'd get used to it....sorry Love.

The P!nk Cruise or The Triathlon of P!nk

2009-10-08T18:22:00.001-07:00

Just couldn't decide on whether to describe this as a cruise or a triathlon...wait...I enjoy cruises all the way through and triathlons I only enjoy when signing up. Ok, The P!nk Cruise it is!

We learned last year that the more friends you can take on a cruise, the better

off you are and the more likely you are to have a grand time for the entire trip. If ever there's a down or slow moment, a friend will come along to get the party started (restarted).

So, we sailed into Fairfax 2 Mondays ago for our first port. We had general admission tickets, so we had to get in line. Thanks so much to our cruise team anchors, Robin & Sherry, for getting to the venue nice & early and securing space for the 6 of us. Fairfax was a lovely port. People were extremely friendly, especially considering we were all competing for the best "seats" in the house.

OK, maybe too friendly. I call this picture "there are people nuttier than us". This is one of

at least 2 pictures of P!nk on this man's body. He also has copies of her tattoos tattoo'd (OK,

I have no idea how to spell that).

We arrived on line about 3 for the 8pm concert. Mj & JJ beat us by only a few minutes, which is good for us, considering we're ALWAYS on GST (Gay Standard Time). Mom was a real trooper and hung out with the 6 of us, even though she had choices since she had a seat. Here's where Mom's seat was:

Yes, I'm a horrible daughter for getting her a crap seat AND making her wait in line for said crap seat. From the discussions

in the car on the way to the hotel afterward, it seems we saw completely different concerts. Mom couldn't understand anything P!nk said when she spoke and she also observed several things we didn't see.

We met several new friends on line, including Morgan & Whitney, two local college students. Not sure I was ever that young & energetic, but Morgan loves P!nk, so it's OK to be a little perky. Morgan gave P!nk a homemade shirt onstage and P!nk said "thank you Morgan". Damn, I could have made her a shirt. Next time. I'd say I'm a dork, but I'm too old to be a dork.

The Ting Tings opened for P!nk or should I say they played before she came on stage. Opened for her connotes they're on a similar talent level. No. We were sadly forced to attend as we'd lose our spots if we left. It took us 3 concerts to learn they were indeed better from the beer/drink line - even before you got to buy your $9.50 Madison Square Garden beer.

In Fairfax, we were to (our) right of the catwalk/stage, on the security barrier. It was awesome. P!nk worked to make eye contact with everyone and we had a great view of her dancing & singing. She was in great voice and seemed to really enjoy herself. I think all 6 of us on the floor were in total awe.

She opened with a video of "Highway to Hell", then entered from beneath the stage to swing high overhead to my fave of the new album, "Bad Influence". Loved the entrance & the song

selection. Not going to go through the set list or the costume changes. Seems a bit boring unless you're obsessed enough to go to 3 concerts or more. I'll try to just hit the highlights. Looking at the pics again this evening made us wish we were going to see her more!

The stage was very large and intricate with a bed, slides, 2 stairways, a runway/catwalk into the middle of the audience with a small stage at the end. She changed costumes a lot, but was not offstage much - she changed jackets and such, but had about 6 major costume changes. The costumes were fun - designed by Bob Mackie of Cher & the Carol Burnett Show fame. Amazing what you can do when you start with a sexy, strong body and then add a little spandex, ribbons, lace & glitter. Mmmmm. Let me say that besides the body, I have never

appreciated any of these (well, maybe a little glitter) until P!nk. Now, Mmmmm.

The Entrance:

We had a good spot to see the concert.

Yeah, that's what I was watching, the concert...

It was a bit of a religious experience for me:

And then Freddy Mercury showed up! At least P!nk channeled him on

"Bohemian Rhapsody".

She then took off the hat & jacket to perform "Funhouse".

I really like her taste in clothes.

After Fairfax, we lost some of our cruisers. So just 4 of us flew up to Boston. I've clearly run out of gas for this blog, so I'll post more about Boston & NY another time.

P!nk

2009-09-29T18:08:00.000-07:00

P!nk

2009-09-26T10:28:00.000-07:00

About 56 hours until the first P!nk concert for us. I'm so excited that I'm nearly wishing away the weekend, but not quite.

We have 2 tickets available for the Fairfax concert Monday night, if anyone is interested.

Farmville

2009-09-11T17:06:00.001-07:00

Farmville is addictive and should be avoided. Anita and I are dreaming of harvesting crops. I've gotten up early two days this week because my tomatoes/pumpkins were in. Perhaps I'm actually growing poppies. I don't know.

Sorry Cathy. Sorry Joy. Sorry Marilou. Sorry Anita. Gary, you're not really my fault.

However, I was growing bored with it last weekend and then the worst thing happened. I thought of something new I could do on it. Leave messages. Not little signs you can't see without clicking.

Here's yesterday's appropriate message.

I especially liked how it looked like a digital billboard as the crops matured.

Yes, I already told you the message was appropriate.

And thanks for all the signs that had some variation of "there's not enough help in all of Farmville".

Today's message is "Some Pig" with an advertisement by Charlotte offering a billboard for rent.

Tomorrow's? Join Farmville on Facebook, become my neighbor and find out.

But, you were warned AND I even showed you a helpful diagram of how bad this addiction is.

The Saga Continues

2009-09-11T17:00:00.000-07:00

One other thing Mark the Comcast Dude said on Tuesday was that a customer service rep would call us on Wednesday to discuss/confirm the confirmation. Friday around 2ish, I email Mark. I get an OOO message. OK, I can wait until Monday. But Monday isn't good enough for Mark. He emails me back within the hour, tells me that I'll be getting a credit for the service and both late fees and that a local rep "tried" to call us and is there another number she can use.

I finally get a voicemail from the rep. I then get her voicemail and give her my work number. Guess what, she doesn't call back today.

Is there a lesson here? Not really - we already knew there were a precious few outstanding Comcast employees. But Mark IS one of them. I have no doubt that he'll at least give me my money back and that has to be enough. My local rep, not outstanding, but with Big Brother watching, it'll get done.

FYI, we have another cable box apparently going bad. hysTERical. But it is a few years old and it doesn't take much to trade it in for a new one....

Comcast as Big Brother

2009-09-08T19:44:00.001-07:00

We have a new reader, Comcast National Customer Support. Welcome to the program!

Anita & I both spoke with Mark today and we look forward to at least a full credit on late fees and the service call that did not fix our problem that turned out to be the cable box (FYI, this in the "Comcast Guarantee" on their website).

He's apologized repeatedly and will be reviewing the service we received by phone and online chat and will be discussing the problems with our regional office - Sheila, baby, this means you.

We'll see if the expected compensation materializes.

Oh, and the next blog will definitely use the phrase Carnival Cruise ship Holiday is lame repeatedly. Wait, I already did that. So much for compensation from Carnival for a pretty bad shipboard experience. They're just lucky I had some of my peeps with me to make it fun among the lameness. Words to live by: never travel without some peeps, marshmallow or otherwise.

Comcast, Key to My Heart

2009-09-06T06:42:00.000-07:00

OK, I may be calm enough to post a tribute to Comcast. Perhaps not quite a tribute, but a definite homage. Alright, maybe not an homage, maybe more of a rant. Rant or diatribe. OK, why are you making me categorize this? You people really annoy me. :-)

On July 28th, after Anita complained to our beloved cable company that the signal on one of our TV's was breaking up, they sent a technician to the house. Said technician jimmied with this, jiggled with that, replace a whatzit here and a doojobbie there and Anita thought the signal had improved, so fine. We found out later that evening that no, it didn't help at all, but the signal breakup didn't really start until we'd been watching TV for 15 minutes.

So, we decided it wasn't the cable signal. I switched out the Tivo box for another one. No improvement. We bypassed the Tivo, no improvement, hmmm, uh oh, flat screen TV for the bedroom, here we come. This all took several days to move around as we never did get started on the "project" until we were ready for bed.

On August 10, we got our monthly invoice for cable, which included a $28.90 charge for the service call. We were surprised as we had never been charged for service before, but, well, they did come into the house to jack around with stuff, so perhaps, well, whatever.

We decided to switch out the cable box. Anita brought the old one in and got a new one (nice and shiny and new and about 1/3 the size of the monster we had. Problem solved. I gotta say that getting the service, getting the bill and switching out the cable box to solve the problem happened far enough apart that it has only just occurred to me that Comcast now owes us $28.90 as the jerkwad that "fixed" our cable didn't fix it and it was Comcast's problem. I was OK with him not fixing it if it was something that belonged to us. Oh, great, another call to Comcast. Fuckmuffins.

Well, back to the original rant, though I seem to have a whole nother one to go off on (or soon will anyway).

When we got the new cable box, not all the channels we get were programmed, even though they said they would be. Bastards. So, we called our friendly, neighborhood cable company at 11pm. Oddly, the first recorded message we heard was that we had a large, past due amount. We didn't think much of it, our payments are electronically transferred on a fixed date every month, so clearly their accounting department was a little behind or something. The technician was able to get our box reprogrammed after only about 30 minutes of hold time and unplugging and replugging the damn thing.

On September 1st, we were watching TV and realized all of our premium channels were gone, on all our TV's. Anita called the cable company and because of our large past due bill, we were sent to the credit & collections department. WHAT???? We've been Comcast customers for 15 years (OK, they've gone through name changes, but I met the cable guy the day we moved into this house greater than 15 years ago, leaving Anita with the movers at the apartment). Anita gets a real person in credit who says that the only way to get our cable back on tonight was to pay our bill by phone (for a 4.95 charge or via their website for a 2.95 charge). WHAT!!?? Anita read our bill to them: "Previous Balance XXX.XX, Payment 8/5 for same, "thank you" etc. At the top it says "UNPAID BALANCE $0.00 - DUE NOW". "New Charges $xxx.xx - DUE 9/6/09". How do we have an unpaid balance?

Evidently, Comcast billed us late for the service call. Somehow, because the service occurred in July, we should have paid for that service on August 5. But they didn't bill us until the 9th and we didn't get the bill until the 10th. No matter to them, our entire invoice is past due. Well, we'd be willing to pay the service call now, but not the whole bill. Nope. Whole thing is due. Nothing comcast credit & collections dude can do for us except Visa, AMEX, etc.

Anita says fine, thanks for nothing and hangs up to tell me what happened. We call back to try to talk to someone in customer service. Nope, back to credit & collections. I talk for 10 minutes about what has transpired and that our bill said it's due on 9/6, the day of the month it's been due on for 15 years. "I'm in credit & collections and there's nothing I can do to change that." I remained calm and yes, I know, but can you transfer me to someone who can help? Well, I could put you on with my supervisor who could transfer me to customer service, but she can't make the transfer herself. OK, please do that. I hear a click and I think OMG, bitch cut me off, I am going to cut someone and then I hear a ring and think whew, that was close and then I hear a recorded message "the supervisor queue can not handle your call right now. Please call back later." Click. And scene.

FUCK! FUCK! Fuck. Assholes. Greedy sonofabitchin' assholes.

I call back (what's the definition of insanity again). I get another woman, fine, who will absolutely not let me finish a sentence but manages to make it sound like I'm the one interrupting her. Yes, I have her name - Sheila, I'm coming for your job, bitch. Anywho, she asks if I've called the 800 customer service line. I say no, I've called the number my freaking invoice says to call. Evidently, my invoice is lacking in many social graces. She politely gives me the 800 #. I hang up with a little violence. I hate cordless phones. It's much harder to make a statement hitting the off button with violence than slamming the phone in it's cradle. Yes, I'm a classic lady.

I call back. Do ya feel me? Guess what? The 800 customer service line directs us right back to credit and collections. This happens to be the number Anita first called, but I didn't realize that. FUCK. Oh, but wait. It is now 9pm and customer service closes at 9. Please try again tomorrow. Bitch Sheila probably knew the 800 number would send me right back here to her closed department and I would no longer be her problem. Really? I'm not going to be her problem any longer? Really, you think that?

All this time (about 1.5 hours), I've been on the internet (thank God, we have Verizon FIOS internet, not that I'm advocating for them, but at least it also didn't get cut off), researching Verizon cable services. I now go to the Comcast website and find they have a customer service online chat. Sweet. 24 hours. Sweet. I log on. "We are currently experiencing an outage in your area and a very high volume of calls. Calls will be worked in the order they come in."

Start at 14. OK, not so bad, quickly go to 12, 11, 9, then back to 14. What the holy fuck. But it's OK, I can work on my blog. Farm on Farmville. Rant on Facebook.

12, 9, 6, 12. Goddammittt. No, wait, I'm cool. I can wait....about an hour!

I go through the whole thing again. She writes that my invoice is overdue and has the audacity to quote the invoice I'm staring at. I asked if she can get an email scan or fax. She suddenly asks if we can pay the invoice by the 6th. YEEESSSSS, the freaking electronic payment is actually already scheduled for the 5th and has been since the day we got the invoice. OK, she can turn on my cable. Is it working now? Uh no. About 5 times for that with bitch continuing to ask if it's working like 5 times while I go in the other room to check. She didn't get that I wasn't in front of the TV chatting - not everyone has a laptop & a wireless network (I do, but wanted my MAC desktop). 5 minutes later, we were all set. I then asked for the interest and one days service to be credited. And she seems to have done it - won't know until the bill comes next week.

SO, I am TRIUMPHANT! Jumping & dancing around the house, even though we have about 4 hours of Tivo'd blackness saved (and in high def, thank you very much), I still conquered the evil forces bent to destroy me. And oh yes, upon closer inspection of our invoice, under the heading "News from Comcast" After it says "As of 8-9-09, we haven't received payment in full from last month's bill." Hysterical. Who reads Comcast news and how exactly were we supposed to prepay a charge we didn't know we were going to get?

I hate F*ing Comcast. Say it with me now.

Vacation Revue

2009-08-25T09:58:00.000-07:00

OK, I suspect this will be more of a review than a revue, but there could be some singing and dancing included, so it is feasible that someone would consider the alternate word. OK, maybe not.

Ok, I'm really pissed off at Comcast right now, but I'll try to finish this post which I started more than a week ago (#14 in the online chat waiting list).

Here's a picture of when I was really happy and not thinking about my crappy cable provider. Perhaps it's just the cocktail I was holding.

This was taken aboard the incredibly LAME-O Carnival cruise ship, "Holiday".

Now let me start by saying that I had a marvelous time on our cruise. Every single one of the personnel aboard the ship was professional, courteous and helpful. It was awesome to reconnect and spend some quality time with old friends aboard ship.

But, the ship is definitely showing it's age. I knew we were in trouble going in when I checked out the Carnival website and the "Holiday" was the only ship in the line that Carnival decided not to put their line name in front of. You know, "Carnival Destination", "Carnival Party Boat", "Carnival Merchant of Death" or something like that. No, we were sailing on "Holiday". Uh oh.

We opted for the best cabin they had: suite, balcony, jacuzzi tub. We walked in and it looked nice. How odd - one of the drawers is broken. Look, there's a nasty crack in the bottom of the sink. Honey, do you smell that (always make sure there is water in the toilet or the sewer gas will back up into the room). Later we found out that you couldn't actually get enough water in the jacuzzi tub to turn the jets on (and I'm betting there was no turning the jets on) and the shower head was at about 5'. Anita's 5'4"...it just occurred to me (I'm a little slow sometimes) that the gym was about 25' from our room and had individual showers - bet Anita could have gotten a nice shower. Oh well.

# 11 in the Comcast customer service online queue.

Anita competed in the "Master Mixologist" competition. She signed up before they published the rules, which said you could only use one type of liquor. So much for the No Recall Martini she is now famous for. Here's a pic.

We think she came in 2nd (a bartender won). She did really well, considering she had a migraine and the competition was in the direct Mexican sun and about 100 degrees.

#9 in line...

Here's some pics of how lame the ship was. Here's the bar, which was used only twice for events the entire cruise. Most events were held in the Bus Stop Bar, which was a lot more like a bus stop than a bar. 4 chairs, 4 stools, 400 people wanting to sing karaoke....maybe it was a good thing there were no chairs. Scheduling everything here was absolutely due to greed by the cruise line. The Bus Stop was right outside the casino and beside the picture selling area. Bastards. Good thing we snuck liquor on and didn't have to pay $6 a drink.

Dead Cow Chairs, Check.

Saddles for Bar Stools, check (why are Terry & Geoffrey so happy?)

Strange, red leather bondage chairs in the middle of the same bar, check.

I did think those would be more fun.

Cupholder on a saddle, OMG, I'm in love.

#14 in line WTF!!!! I HATE COMCAST.

First port was Progreso. As far as I can tell, Progreso consists of a 5 mile long pier and nothing else. On the bright side, we decided to take the 2.5 hour bus ride to the Mayan ruins named Chichen Itza (pronounced chicken pizza by most of my friends). There were no chickens on the bus, so that was a plus. We were not hijacked and kidnapped - another plus. This place was amazing. The Pyramid of Culculcan represents a calendar. There are 91 steps on each of 4 sides, then one step at the top (365 days). On the solstice (I don't remember which one or all), the sunlight makes it appear as if a snake is coming down the steps and the sunlight goes through the openings at the top. Cool.

Hopefully, this pic gives an idea of the scale of this massive thing.

Because I know this picture doesn't.

And there were lots of other structures: the playing field with home & away benches. Amy's in the home picture.

No one would stand next to the away bench->

, the skull wall thingy field,

The Mall

Yes, that is a Gap Kids on the right.

OK, too tired to do anymore & I can't figure out how to easily transfer photos from Picasa to Blogger....

Gone Cruisin'

2009-08-14T12:58:00.000-07:00

But I leave you with one of my favorite triathlon pictures:

Debbie seemed worried, I was thrilled not to freeze my betooties off at SML a few years back. Of course, they let/made us swim, damn it.

Pre-Vacation Post

2009-08-13T06:09:00.000-07:00

Last post before the cruise. Ahhh.

September 12th is clearly the antidote to September 11. We've been invited to another party. Another party I want to attend. Yet there's nothing to do on the 13th. What's up with that?

So, a golf tournament, 3 parties, and oh yes, I'm supposed to go to a board meeting. All on the 12th....hmmmm.

Angela, don't you think you should announce your presence on this blog?

Anthem Moonlight Ride

2009-08-12T08:03:00.001-07:00

This was a LOT of fun and I recommend it to everyone - whether you've ridden a bike the last 10 years or not. It was a very casual ride. It was a little hairy at first as hundreds of riders tried to get going. Lots of coasting on one pedal and I even walked my bike for a few hundred yards. But everyone was very friendly and we did finally get moving. I was just glad the ride start did not resemble this:We had a great time waving to kids who were watching. We rode up Hermitage/Lakeside from The Diamond, then through Bryan Park. As we entered Bryan Park, the sun went down for real. It got DARK. Funny how that works. Anita, of course, carefully outfitted our bikes with headlights and taillights, but it was still crazy-dark and lots of riders had no lights. The organizers had put down glow sticks to keep us on the road, but some kids were stopping unexpectedly to pick the glow sticks up! It was a little frightening, but we got through it with no casualties.

As we finished up, we saw the entire IMUSA team lounging around. This was a little shocking as they said they were riding the full moon and gave us a comical look when told we were doing the 1/2 moon. Now I know I'm slow, but to have them be well-rested and have their bikes put away before I could ride 8 miles is a little ridiculous. Turns out that the long course turn was only a few hundred yards away from the finish and the beer was calling louder than more biking. So, we didn't get lapped!

Here's a picture of "The Dream Team" getting ready to ride with Anita playing caboose in her Christmas lights:
After the ride, we put our bikes away and shared a beer or two with the dream team and IMUSA dream team. Not sure how I took no pictures of the IMUSA team, but it was fun hanging out with them and hearing just a few of their tales.

Everyone has to do this one next year.

Help!

2009-08-11T12:18:00.001-07:00

Can someone please answer why I'm thinking & talking about drinking more Koolaid? Thinking about backing off a game of skill (and some people consider a sport) that I'm actually good at to go back to a sport I'm awful at? A sport that I pretty much hate while I'm doing it? I did it. I finished the (*@&$_!*( thing (twice). Yes, 14 minutes and 20 seconds shy of glory. I don't know if I'm trying to prove something and if so, to whom? OK, I don't know the proper use of whom, but you get it.

Please help me figure this out and fast.

So You Think You Can Dance

2009-08-07T19:56:00.000-07:00

We love this show. It starts again in 1 month. Watch it! For inspiration, here's a picture of Spot playing "Dance Dance Revolution" - it's his favorite game.

On another note, I am wondering why September 12th is such a popular day this year. Way too many fun things to do (to waste time with non-fun things). Why haven't you invited us to do something fun on September 12? No danger of us accepting!

And speaking of Wii, we bought the Wii Sports Resort last week. Having fun with it, though I expect it'll get old fairly quickly. We have been enjoying sword fighting, frisbee golf, 3 point bball contest, and canoeing better than the rest.

Looking forward to posting pictures of the Anthem Moonlight Ride...

Hi

2009-08-06T06:53:00.000-07:00

Gee, I missed you.

Moments of excitement the last 2 months, but mostly just work, golf & sleep.

It was awe-inspiring to follow the IMUSA crazies. I say "crazies" with all sorts of affection. DB having her toe broken in the swim and continuing. Not just continuing, but excelling. Doesn't matter, did it anyway. Awesome. CD with a bad hip that had to kill on the bike and couldn't have been comfortable on the run. Doesn't matter, did it anyway! SK doing the whole race with a bad hamstring. Not supposed to run. Doesn't matter, did it anyway. SS enjoying a picnic on the bike, but them suffering new forms of leg & foot cramps. Wanted to quit. Doesn't matter, did it anyway, and with an hour to spare. KB kicking ass & finishing in daylight! What!? Just don't get that. And to think I knew her when she'd never run a race of any kind. How cool.

Got new irons. Very exciting. Got a new putter. Very exciting. Played great for a week, then came back to my regular golf game. Finally broke a 20 handicap again (on the good side). Thought I'd crack it by May. Took until July 31. Oh well. Playing lots of golf, but still haven't found the groove.

Still haven't played Roller Derby Mountain Bike Polo Golf. But soon, I just know it.

Haven't been on my mountain bike since the day I put on the clips....and immediately fell down. Didn't get hurt, but crushed my confidence. Need to get another lesson as it feels like everything has changed on the bike because of the pedals.

Riding the Anthem Moonlight Bike Ride Saturday night. Not for exercise, just for the costume possibilities & the party afterwards. Hope it'll be fun. Come on out!

Going on a cruise a week Saturday with friends. Looking forward to not working for a week, but it is a pretty critical time with potentially large asset sales in the offing for my bankrupt company. Lots of work between now & vacation.

Thinking about restarting some training. Not over the top training, just some training. I'd like to swim faster (Ok, a lot faster - much more than 14 minutes/20 seconds faster)...

Maybe I'll just go back to martial arts; I used to enjoy that a lot and I'll need something for the winter months when it's too cold for golf.

And so ends this stream of consciousness. Just needed to check in. No guarantees as to the next time I'll post. I know you miss me, but you can't smother me, I need my freedom. Set me free and if it's true between us, I'll return....

heh, heh

2009-06-04T14:33:00.000-07:00

This week

2009-05-28T10:48:00.000-07:00

Disjointed post alert.

I'm a little depressed this week. Work is just sooo difficult to maintain any motivation. It's pretty depressing - I estimate there are 57 people still employed by my company in Richmond. Next Friday that number drops to 40 or so. Down from 2000 in December. Every day is like the final episode of "Survivor" where you reminisce about those voted out. But we don't ever get a bonfire. I'm thinking a nice bonfire would help with the depression. No, I'm not contemplating being the source of a fire nor instigating a fire. I'm just saying.

Now in the past 9 days, Anita & I have played golf 7 times, I think. That's been fun. We've decided to form a support group, "Golfers Anonymous". "Hello, my name is CJ and I shot a 40 for 9 last night. Yes, there are dishes in the sink and the clothes aren't washed, but did you see that drive on number 8? Sweet!" Golf may be the only thing keeping me sane these days. I almost ran over the weekend. See, I do need help!?

Oh, and the word for the day is "Fuckmuffins". I mean, why not?

NYC Retri

2009-05-24T18:20:00.000-07:00

Obviously I don't speak French because I have no idea what's after dux or duex or dues or whatever.

I had to go to Manhattan on business a week ago, so we decided to make a weekend out of it. Anita walked the city as I had my meeting - she spent a lot of time at the NY Public Library and

Bryant Park, then headed uptown to try to see "The View", but there were no openings. She emailed me throughout the day so I knew she was wandering and was OK and safe.

We stayed at the Hilton Garden Inn on 8th and 48th, which was fine - a large room by NY standards, but nothing to write home about, though we did have a decent view of the river & sunset.

We had checked "The Times" for what shows were playing and decided to see two of our favorite actresses, Angela Lansbury in "Blithe Spirit" and Susan Sarandon in "Exit the King". "The Times" gave each of these shows reviews in the fair to good category.

We saw Noel Coward's "Blithe Spirit" Thursday evening. Besides Angela Lansbury, it starred Rupert Everett and Christine Ebersole and also had Jayne Atkinson and Debra Rush - all of whom you'd know if you saw if the names don't ring a bell. It was OK - mildly amusing without any significant charm. Of course, it was wonderful to see eighty-something Angela Lansbury larking about but the play suffered when she wasn't onstage. Unfortunately, Rupert Everett was on stage for most of the play and there was just something "off" about his performance. This is pretty funny as he played an Englishman. He is an Englishman - you'd think he could've pulled that off. But he mugged a lot and seemed to be overacting; I wondered several times if he was just bored with his role and the play in general. I'd call this mildly recommended for Angela Lansbury fans, decent 3rd choice in the TKTS line for others seeking mild amusement.

We walked the city together on Friday as it was a gorgeous day - high 70's and beautiful blue sky. we spent a lot of time exploring Central Park and debated renting a row boat for an hour and then debated lunching at "Tavern on the Green". We went so far as to go inside and review a menu at the latter, but decided we really could just have a $2 hot dog and be just as, if not more content than if we'd spent $25 on a shrimp cocktail. We found the Castle in the Park and thoroughly enjoyed exploring.

Next we walked south, checking out the neighborhoods of monied folks as we made our way to Madison Square Garden to see if P!nk (you didn't think I'd write a blog entry this year that fails to mention her, did you?) tickets would be on sale at the box office on Saturday when they went on sale at Ticketmaster (otherwise known as the thief in the night). Regretably MSG box office only sells tickets the day after Ticketmaster sales start. So, instead of paying only a $4 convenience fee (can anyone tell me what's convenient about flying to NY to see if I can buy a P!nk ticked at the box office of the venue she'll be performing at), we had to pay the outrageous $12 PER TICKET convenience fee of Ticketmaster. After checking out MSG, we had a couple of burgers at White Castle, then headed to Macy's. I'm in the market for a couple of new suits as I'll be interviewing some day soon and (I know this is hard for some of you to believe) I've put on a few pounds. A few being my ASS IS AS BIG AS CHICAGO.... When I had to put my suit on Thursday morning to fly to NYC, I realized that the suit I had tailor made in Singapore is no longer just a bit large on me. Now it's tight. Everywhere. I HATE it when the dry cleaners shrink my pants. So we spent some significant time in the ladies suits department and I found a couple I liked that were very reasonably priced. Then I tried them on. Damn it, either my ass is REALLY as big as Chicago, or they've just started making the asses and waistlines of these suitpants smaller (and the legs longer). WTF. So, newsflash, I'm thinking my ass is as big as Chicago. Fuckmuffins. (God, I love that word). Anita & I are going on a diet...when we're ready...cruise in 80 days....hmmm.

But back to the point....we left Macy no poorer and not weighted down with purchases! Then it was time, once again, to head to TKTS. Tonight's goal was "Exit the King". We checked the theater to see if there were any rush seats available, but they only sell student rush. We took the time to read the entire "Times" review which was posted at the theater and it felt like a rave...I say felt like, because clearly we misread it. The first act was funny - well, a little funny anyway. Geoffrey Rush's entrance and physical comedy was quite good. Susan Sarandon looked magnificent and was spot on in her role as the first Queen. Lauren Ambrose of "6 Feet Under" fame was good; Andrea Martin was quite amusing as the maid. As I said, the first act was funny. Probably very funny for a good 30 minutes. But it lasted 1.5 hours or so. The last hour was the same joke, retreaded for our enjoyment. It really didn't work, but it was OK, it just got a little old. Intermission and big laugh as the performers run back to the positions that closed the 1st act. That was the last laugh of the show. I actually hit sound sleep at one point. It wasn't funny. It wasn't poignant. It made no new points, broke no new ground from the first act. It was a very large relief when the King exited. NOT RECOMMENDED.

On the walk to the hotel from the theater (one block if we went directly, but probably 20 blocks as it was a beautiful evening), we decided we were done with plays for the season. So, if we saw a show Saturday before leaving for home, it'd be a musical. We checked the Tony nominations and saw that "Next to Normal was nominated for best musical. Someone in the TKTS line (because you have to chat with total strangers in the TKTS line to sort out and verify your choices) said that it was great, but being about a bipolar actress did not make it the feel good musical of the year. We decided that if it were on the board, we'd see it.

Saturday dawned a little chilly & overcast. We took another long walk and had breakfast in an Irish restaurant on 8th Avenue. The food was not good, but when we reported this to the manager, she charged us only for what we liked, which was nice - so we paid for my bacon and a diet coke! Anita's coke wasn't even very good. Weird.

Standing back in the TKTS line, we made some new friends and we all decided that "Next to Normal" was the thing to see. As we were only a step or two away from the ticket window, I chatted up one of the TKTS paid wanderers and he told us that we had made a really good choice, but ominously added "I don't think we have very good seats though". Not very good at all as they sold out as we got to the window! Crap, once again we did not have a good second choice ready. There were tickets available for last year's best musical, "In the Heights", but I'd heard quite a bit of the soundtrack and wasn't that excited about it. Another 2009 best musical nominee was "Rock of Ages" which is a love story that takes place in 1987 (GLORY DAYS, BABY), but we were a little concerned about the decibel level of a musical featuring the music of Foreigner, Twisted Sister & Poison. I asked the people behind us in line what they were seeing - "Rock of Ages". I asked our new friends who were in the line next to us - either "In the Heights" or "Rock of Ages". It was again our turn at the ticket window. I asked "what do you have better seats for - ITH or ROA? He said "eh, there about the same." Crap. Now how do we decide. I said "2 for Rock of Ages" at about the same time that Anita said "In the Heights". The ticket guy only heard me. I turned to the folks behind us and said "see you there" and "I bet we have better seats than you" (trust me, it was funny). We then got some lunch and went to the drug store to buy earplugs - just in case. We have about 100 "Just In Case" earplugs in the house now.

Big build up to this show, right?

We get in line to go in and they're passing out something that looks like a lighter, says "Rock of Ages" and is really a flashlight to hold up as if we're at a concert. Cool AND funny before the show even starts. Nice. The entire theater is decorated like 1987 Los Angeles/Hollywood, the stage looks like a bar with a small bandstand in the rear and there are waiters and waitresses taking drink orders. Drink Orders. At a Broadway show. Awesome. What do you mean I don't have to wait until intermission to buy a $4 bottle of water, $6 beer or a $10 mixed drink? You'll bring it to my seat. FUN. Then the people sitting behind us turn out to be the people behind us in line. Of course, I mentioned again that our seats were waayy better than theirs.

The lights go down and this awesome and funny and inspiring show comes out of nowhere. It was really great. It probably helps a lot that I was in my 20's in the 80's, but I don't think it's a prerequisite. There is a narrator that channels Jack Black and the whole thing was intelligent and touching and well, just great. Didn't even need the ear plugs. There probably isn't anything to give away, but just go see this show, especially if you were in your teens or 20's in the 80's. It was a blast.

We capped Saturday off with another long walk that took us to just south of the fashion district, looking for a restaurant. We found Keene's chophouse and though we were clearly underdressed, it was early enough that they didn't say a word. We had a lovely dinner, another nice walk, then cabbed to the airport for our 10pm flight that finally took off as Saturday Night Live was ending - bummer. We got home at 3, watched the "Survivor" Thursday night episode where Coach was FINALLY voted off. Mosied off to bed at 4:30 or so and slept clear until noon Sunday, which was fine since the weather was rainy & cold (sorry we missed cheering all our friends on at the Rockett's Landing Olympic tri/duathlon).

Great weekend.

Question

2009-05-21T12:37:00.000-07:00

I refuse to go back and review my blog posts, but I'm pretty sure I've only written about the following this whole year:

P!nk
New York City visits
Golf
Mountain biking

So, question: am I boring you? Should I just keep a diary? Or do you want to propose topics I should cover (yes, I'm a little nervous about this question)?

In my defense, when I was training for IM, I mostly was one track there too...you just may have been more interested in it...

For Annnnnnn

2009-05-18T04:39:00.000-07:00

I can very nearly review the P!nk concert already as I have watched quite a bit of her European & Australian tour via youtube:

It was amazing. I laughed. I cried. I was awestruck.

I wore earplugs to ensure my old ears were protected yet I was still able to hear P!nk's amazing voice. We lined up 3 hours before the doors opened in order to get in the front of general admission. The Ting Tings were fine, but I'd rather have had no opening act.

My only regret is that I did not buy tickets to more of her concerts. I guess I'm a P!nkhead, which is better than having pink eye and about on par with being a Dead Head, but with fewer compatriots.

I'm sure I'll have more to write about this in late September.

FYI

2009-05-17T15:25:00.000-07:00

P!nk was on Ellen on Friday. Ellen is giving a way a set of tickets to each P!nk concert (among others).

www.ellentv.com

P!nkest

2009-05-17T14:42:00.001-07:00

Fairfax. Check

Boston. Check

NYC. Check

WOOOOOHOOOO.

P!nker

2009-05-08T19:17:00.001-07:00

By this point, I'm guessing that my loyal readers may be bored with the subject matter (or jealous), but we scored tickets to P!nk in BOSTON today. Yeah BABY. FYI, it's not stalking if you buy tickets.

Yes, we intend to see her in NYC too....

Oh and a special shout out to my favorite Caps fan....yoohoo, don't look now, but that series you were winning is TIED UP. Go Pens!

P!nk Eagle

2009-05-05T18:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, so last Monday, Anita got her first eagle ever. I was working late, so I didn't get to see it, just got the completely hysterical, thought somebody had died phone call, before figuring out it was a "good" kind of hysterical. She pitched in from a sand trap on number 3 at the Crossings.

Thursday morning P!nk tickets went on pre-sale and I FOOLISHLY volunteered to buy for our "group". I'm not sure I've ever experienced that kind of pressure before, but I managed to buy 2 sets of 4 seats, completely opposite each other in the arena, but both sets look to be OK.

Friday night, Anita & I went to Cambridge, Maryland for the "Wild Goose Chase" bike ride through a nature preserve. Ride was on Sunday, so we played golf on Saturday. We decided to be lazy and play the gorgeous, but expensive course, on the hotel property. I got my first ever eagle on # 11 at River Marsh. So Anita & I have been playing golf together for just about EXACTLY 19 years and we both get our first ever eagles within 5 days of each other. I'm thinking: "Weird". She's thinking "we're meant to be together". Guess which one is the romantic? But very cool anyway and I no longer have to be extremely supportive and jealous at the same time, which was just a little painful!

At the same time I was getting my eagle, Michelle & Jody were once again online for P!nk tickets, checking out the general admission floor seating - rush the stage tix, which were oddly sold out on Thursday. They got 6 tix. So, now we have 14 seats for 8 folks. Major dilemma - save fixed seats or sell them...hmmm...fortunately, we have months to decide whether or not to sell the extra seats. P!NK!!!!! so cool. Deanna & Cathy - I believe seats are still available and I can tell you she has a great show, just based on when she opened for Justin Timberlake...check her European concerts out on youtube - definitely a must see for any P!nk fans. Rumor is she'll announce more dates/venues as sales are successful.

The "Wild Goose Chase" bike ride was a lot of fun. Not just because the goodie bags had cool stuff. Not just because a bunch of friends did it. Not just because it wasn't a RACE and I could just coast occasionally. Not just because I could stop to pick up the maps folks had dropped on the way - my bit to save the planet - and then pedal hard to catch up with my peeps. Not just because I COULD catch up with my peeps. Not just because I was repeatedly excited to remember that I could get off the bike and get a beer and food at mile 25. Not just because I didn't have an additional 87 miles to ride. Not just because I had no race cutoffs to calculate & beat. Not just because I hadn't already swum 2.4 miles. Just because I didn't have to run off the bike. Hallelujah. It was difficult just walking from putting the bikes in the car to check to see if we won prizes (I won a buff, woo hoo). I'm thinking I don't miss triathlon. Yes, I have to remind myself fairly constantly - especially after reading Peep's blogs. Yes, this means you.

So, yes, this was a helluva week AND it doesn't mention that we filed all the first schedules & statements with the bankruptcy court, which means I'm pretty much done with 16 hour days, 6 days a week. One helluva week.

FYI, still haven't decided whether to race the Urban Assault Mountain bike race (haven't actually been on the mountain bike with the new pedals - too much golf and waaayyyy too much rain). Anyone out there considering??? Not sure there are any mountainbike afficianodo's reading this.....

P!nk

2009-04-28T21:53:00.002-07:00

YAY - P!nk is finally touring the US - for 4 whole concerts before returning to Europe.

Can't wait for September - she's coming to Fairfax!

Great Weekend

2009-04-12T15:53:00.000-07:00

Anita & I took Mountainbiking 101 with Endorphin Fitness on Saturday. The instructors were 3 of the same folks who taught the RTC mountainbiking clinic and they were again very informative, very patient and very encouraging.

3 hours of instruction & drills gives me almost enough confidence to get clipless pedals for my mountain bike - a thing I thought I'd never do. But there is only so much you can make your bike do when you're not attached to it. Not sure I can make it do anything when I am attached, but what the heck! I think Anita enjoyed it too, though she got two really nasty pedal knocks. I was very proud of her for getting back on the bike after the second, really bad one. She's very brave. She's also thinking about clipless - or at least pedals without teeth!

We also found out that the bike race associated with Xterra isn't cancelled, it's just not on the same weekend as Xterra. It's sometime in May...not sure I'll be ready for that, but maybe...

So Happy Easter! We celebrated just the way we like to - traditional Polish breakfast with my Mom - kielbasa, hard-boiled eggs & horseradish (let the burping begin) and then off to the golf course with good friends.

We played 27 holes of golf with MJ and JJ. We were only planning on playing 18, but it turned into such a gorgeous day and the golf wasn't killing us either, so we just kept right on. Yes, my golf game has come back, at least a little - I'm much happier with it. Friday at lunchtime, I went to the driving range and hit the worst bucket of balls I've ever hit, so I had a bit of trepidation when teeing off today. But I played pretty well until I started thinking about it too much...had a great day though. The rest of the group also played well, so we were all happy with the day.

Hope you all had as good a weekend as I did.

Xterra Mountain Bike Assault...

2009-04-09T19:02:00.001-07:00

has gone the way of the dinosaur. So run bike run, or just run run run. Hmmmm. Guess I'll check out the Poor Farm races this year....

FYI, I played OK golf this evening - started off bad, but got better, so I think I'm turning the corner - shame that the corner is one of 4 - I keep going around the same block!

Thanks to Fave, Anita & I are doing the Endorphin mountain bike 101 clinic this weekend. Anyone else doing it?

Bad Golf

2009-04-04T18:28:00.000-07:00

Anita & I played in a golf tournament today. I played very badly. It was a very long day. Fortunately, Anita played well and we were playing as a team, so we came in 4th place and won a prize.

So if I'm bad at golf and I suck at triathlon....

wouldn't it be nice to be good at a sport?

Oh well. Maybe I'll find a new sport. I've been told not to play darts. People could get hurt.

I'm Baaaack

2009-03-19T07:29:00.000-07:00

Really fun mountain bike clinic last night. Great job RTC and Endorphin.

It's official - I REALLY DO LOVE MOUNTAINBIKING! I'm still a hill slug and I really need to work on my cardio - I have lost any fitness level I had! I was the only one in the group huffing & puffing - so much so that it made me think perhaps I held my breath coming up the hill, but nope.

So anytime anyone wants to hit the Buttermilk trails along Riverside, let me know and I'll be ready. We can meet at my house and head out. Come one, come all. I'll speed past you on the downhills and you can pass me as I hike my bike up the hills!

Mountain Biking

2009-03-18T04:30:00.000-07:00

I am so excited about the Richmond Tri Club's mountain bike clinic tonight! It means so many things to me:
* It's going to be 70 degrees today and it's not raining
* I will be out of work at 5 to get there and be ready at 6
* I've finally dusted off my mountain bike after 3+ years of doing nothing but road biking
* I can now have fun while getting exercise instead of just looking at my bike computer to
see how slow I'm going!

Just think, maybe I'll get back into trail running! Then I can consider the Xterra!

But wait, when I used to mountainbike, I'd crawl up the hills (hence my favorite "Hill Slug" jersey), then fly the downhills. I'm guessing that my mortality awareness factor is way up from 3-5 years ago, so I may be crawling up and down. And what if that means I don't enjoy it like I used to? Or perhaps I never really did enjoy it - maybe it's just like road tri's - it sounds like a good idea right up until you actually start doing any of the sports! Aggghhh!

My friends say I think too much. But I don't think so. (I stole this line from a comedian I once saw on TV).

I am comforted by the fact that if I don't enjoy the clinic tonight, I can always play more golf!

The Proposal

2009-03-17T06:17:00.000-07:00

One of the blogs I read regularly recently told the incredibly super-romantic story of how she was proposed to:

http://joneslovesnewbones.blogspot.com/

Allow me to (who's gonna stop me, you?) recreate for you the truly romantic proposal I received from my lovely bride.

The year, 1990. The time, Christmas Eve. The place, Asheville, NC. OK, this sort of sounds like "Rent". We were in Asheville to visit our parents. Both sets of parents lived in Asheville at the time - Asheville is Anita's hometown and my folks had moved down from NY just after I graduated college. Anita & I met in Richmond, but my Dad worked less than a mile from where Anita's Mom lived. We truly were destined to be together.

So, Christmas Eve in Asheville. We were hungry. Not a lot of places open for a late lunch. Pizza Hut was pretty much our only choice. So, after ordering a romantic pepperoni & mushroom pie, we start chatting. Talking about how we were always destined to be together. Anita says "hey, want to get hitched?".

No ring. No candlelight. No bended knee. Just a "you've got tomato sauce on your chin" kind of statement.

Naturally, I was swept off my feet and immediately said a teary yes.

What I didn't mention to her then is that I would make fun of this proposal for the rest of our lives. She's been a really good sport. So far.

Love you Sweetheart.

The Running of the Bulldogs and the Return of Spring

2009-03-08T07:16:00.000-07:00

What an amazing day. 6 days ago, we in Richmond received about a foot of snow and the temperature hovered at 11 for several days. Anita & I built a snowman prior to the temperature plummeting. We had a wonderful time doing it.

Friday it got up to 50 degrees and Saturday morning dawned with temperatures in the low 60's.

I got up early to join Annnn, Deanna & Jen for the St Bridget's Bulldog 5k. Annnn's young daughter decided to join us at the last minute, which changed our race strategy (but only slightly). After some significant and last minute changes to where the actual starting line was (and which direction the race would go), we started off on what was supposed to be a run a little (slowly), walk a little kind of an outing. Turns out Deanna was sandbagging just a bit because somehow having just finished recovery from a foot stress fracture, she was fast. OK, fast is not objective. However, I'm here to tell you as a fully indoctrinated back of the packer that Deanna no longer qualifies (I don't know if she ever did).

That's nothing against Deanna. Nothing. One of the nicest and most generous folks on the face of the Earth, she can hang with us back of the back of the packers any time. But that doesn't make her a member!

Anyway, I hung with Deanna & Jen until a little shortcut was taken by young race pack. When we caught back up with Lulu's group, I dropped out of the overachievers and walked/ran with Annnnn, Ashley & Lulu - all dictated by what Lulu felt like.

The whole "run" was wonderful and I enjoyed every minute. And then it got better! After losing Ann momentarily, we all went over to Cafe Something or Other on Grove, just a brief walk from St. Bridget's where Annnnnnnn indoctrinated us into the newest and best after-race event ever. Good wine, good friends and good food.

I'm thinking of running 100 yard dashes every Saturday, just for wine at 9am with good people!

So after a great Saturday morning, I hurry home, shower & change and hit the golf course by 11:40 with Anita & Deanna's husband, Gary. We had a great time, though the golf was slowed dramatically be people in front of us. Slow golf is awful, but it was offset by chatting and catching up some with Gary.

All in all, a GREAT Saturday!

Qimonda voicemail message goes viral

2009-02-26T18:39:00.001-08:00

My buddy, Jim Ellis, who I spent the last 7+ years with at Qimonda, was let go a couple of weeks ago. He left a parting gift for those left behind and, as it turns out, half the country. He recorded a parting voicemail answering message.

As of tonight, his work phone number is still live: 804-952-8984.

I heard this was on the CBS Richmond News last week, but the station did not contact Jim at all - he didn't even see it!

Check it out on youtube with some pictures of mostly former Qimonda employees. By the way, Jim's the one in front in the last picture.

Qimonda Voicemail Message

Everything is going to be OK

2009-02-25T18:38:00.000-08:00

Thank God! I now know everything is going to be OK. Really!

Last night we watched a very important address by President Obama. I'm willing to make sacrifices for the greater good and I'm hoping that others listening will do the same. I'm sure he will help us through this crisis.

Then, today, the ultimate sign that the impending apocalypse has been averted happened.

Tiger's back. His first two holes after an 8 month layoff? Birdie - Eagle and a crushing win in match play.

Let the optimism begin.

The Most Boring Reality Show Ever

2009-02-24T04:41:00.000-08:00

See our hero wake at 2am, wondering how the bankruptcy petition will work.

See her toss and turn for 3 hours - flipping channels - watching "The Grapes of Wrath" and getting new fears about this economy. Please no massive drought, please!

See her smash the alarm at 7, searching for the elusive snooze button.

See her go through Qimonda's version of tribal council, where you must prove your usefulness or be dismissed.

See her close the financials with 25% of the original staff.

See her try not to be depressed and cynical.

It's "The Accounting Manager", coming this Fall.

I keep expecting to see Jeff Probst's dimples somewhere, but he hasn't shown up. Someone should tell him to stop coloring his hair (not that I know he is). I bet he'll look distinguished if he goes for the aging gracefully look.

PS, we won't even talk about the plodding hours of triathlon training and now the added excitement of golf.

Favorite Pictures I have Taken

2009-02-17T17:08:00.000-08:00

Canada really is tough.

This squirrel was tougher than Canada.

I do not think that means what you think it means.

NYC Redux

2009-02-15T15:49:00.000-08:00

Yes, we went to New York and saw several shows for my birthday in January.

Yes, I am about to get laid off from my job.

Yes, we went back to NY last weekend anyway. Someone has to stimulate the economy.

A couple of weeks ago, I happened to see an advertisement for "Broadway Backwards", which is a benefit for the NYC Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual & Transgendered Center. Packed with stars, it is Broadway love songs with a decidedly different portrayal. Tickets were expensive, but available, airfare and hotels were really cheap, so we went!

We saw 5 shows in 3 days! I think Anita & I may have to go to Broadway Anonymous to curb our addiction, but I'm pretty sure that BA is Bulemics Anonymous. That won't work for us.

So we arrived Saturday morning, checked into the Doubletree on Times Square, then went directly to the TKTS 1/2 price tickets booth. We saw "Speed the Plow" with William H. Macy, Raul Esparza and Elizabeth Moss. It was funny and very short. It's a pretty cynical dark comedy about how things get done in Hollywood.

We got out of the show and headed back to TKTS to pick up tickets for the evening performance. We decided on something lighter - "Alfred Hitchcock's The 39 Steps" which is supposed to be a farce with 4 people playing a bunch of different roles. TKTS always has tickets for the long running show. We get up to the window and kablammy - they're sold out! Since they always have tickets, we didn't have a backup picked out, so we decided to see 2008's Best Play Tony Winner, "August: Osage County". We then saw that it was 3 hours and 20 minutes long! We got a couple pieces of pizza and headed back to the room for a nap - we hadn't had much sleep in days.

I think we were both pretty worried about a 3 hour play. I was pleasantly surprised to see that Elizabeth Ashley, John Cullum and Estelle Parsons were in this family tragicomedy. They were all excellent. There's a special place in my heart for Elizabeth Ashley from my childhood. She starred in a horrible movie of the week, "One of My Wives is Missing" with James Franciscus and Jack Klugman. It was awful, but I loved it and fell in love with her.

We loved the play. It was hysterical and dark at the same time. No laughing through tears like "Steel Magnolias", but pretty close. We had no trouble staying awake during it and though the seats are pretty cramped, the show kept us entertained from start to finish. We even got autographs at the stage door, which was a lot of fun. We missed Estelle Parsons and John Cullum - John was only in the very first scene and didn't take a curtain call. I guess it wasn't really worth it to stay 3 more hours!

Sunday we again headed to TKTS! I've promised Anita that we can go to NY sometime when it's warm and not just go to Broadway! She seems OK with it though. We got tickets to the normally sold out, off-Broadway show, "Becky Shaw". This is also a dark comedy, what a surprise. It was great and we laughed a lot.

The comedienne, Kate Clinton and her spouse, Urvashi Vaid, sat in front of us for Becky Shaw. I urged them to come to Richmond - she asked if I was just trying to get rid of her or if we were from there. We chatted quite a bit after that and funny thing that Richmond was referenced in the first 5 lines of the play! They both turned around and stared at us at this! We chatted more at intermission and they are both extremely charming and humorous folks. Both are extremely active politically. Check out Kate's website www.kateclinton.com to see what she's got to say about the state of the world.

After the play, we decided that since "Broadway Backwards" was a benefit, perhaps we needed to be more dressed up than we planned. Naturally, that meant we had to shop! yes, we are REALLY good at stimulating the economy. But I'm afraid we added to the deflation woes as we got some incredible deals at Macy's.

Sunday night, we saw "Avenue Q" for the second time. It's really a fun little musical if you can stand the R rated puppet sex that is performed and all the talk of porn. Being from NY, this is not a problem for me, but it's funny how uncomfortable it can be to watch puppets having sex.

I know my posts are too long. Sorry. I'll save the description of "Broadway Backwards" for another time!

I'm OK, Qimonda Isn't

2009-02-04T15:05:00.001-08:00

Just a quick post to let everyone know that I'm actually still employed at Qimonda, though 500 less people are than on Monday.

I don't have an exit date and probably won't know more for a month or two as they ramp down production & shut down the factory. People will be let go as the workload decreases. Being in accounting, I'll be nearer the end as we close the books and the business.

I'm fine. I've felt this was coming for a long time. Sure, I'd hoped the company would make it and failing that, that they'd take care of their employees on the way out. That isn't working out for anyone laid off this week and in the future - our parent company in Germany has seen to that as they try to continue life as a leaner semi-conductor manufacturer without the "weight" of Richmond.

But because I've seen the writing on the wall, we've economized some (I know some of you that know us are laughing) and changed some things around too. I hope to take some time off while I search for a job that is as fulfilling as this one has been financially (ok, still want the new one to be financially fulfilling too). I have enjoyed much of my time with Qimonda - it has been a good company. Most importantly, the people I've worked with have truly been very valued teammates. They are all good folks and I will miss working with them. I'm hopeful we can stay in touch (though that's mostly been a challenge for me in my work life).

Really though, I just wanted you to know not to worry. Anita & Spot & I are and will continue to be fine. OK, Spot's going on 18 and has a heart murmur, but he's still running around here, bumping into everything and doing his spot on (heh, heh) impersonation of a Roomba. I just wish he would actually vacuum.

All the best,

PS I was told today that I should consider stand up comedy. So I am officially announcing my availability for birthday parties, bachelorette parties, triathlon parties, etc. No, I don't intend to entertain, I just like parties.

Jethro's Triathlon

2009-01-29T17:07:00.000-08:00

Just FYI, I finally finished the story of the horribly disorganized Iron distance race I did in August 2007. If you're interested, you can look under old posts and find it.

Uh Oh

2009-01-24T19:20:00.000-08:00

Qimonda AG & Qimonda Dresden declared bankruptcy in Germany yesterday.

I work for Qimonda North America.

Uh oh.

On a brighter note, I may have plenty of time to do some volunteer work (especially if they feed you after volunteering).

Service

2009-01-22T11:58:00.000-08:00

I think the answer to my last post is both "Habitat" and something on ServiceUSA.org. I'll keep you posted on my personal journey to additional volunteerism.

Hope

2009-01-20T11:19:00.000-08:00

I watched President Obama get sworn in today while I was with my co-workers. Some of us voted for him, some of us didn't, but I think that everyone agrees that we hope he can do what he is trying to do. And I think he can. I know he can with our help and support.

I surprised myself. I only had tears flow 3 times. That's pretty good for me.

Obama says we must all pitch in to help. Anita & I are looking for new volunteer opportunities. I think we're leaning towards "Habitat for Humanity". What do you suggest?

I've been the treasurer of Virginia Breast Cancer Foundation for the last 3 years. My term ends Saturday. I've found that I really can not volunteer in accounting - I have to do something different - perhaps something that doesn't require too much brainpower! I am open to suggestions.

Ex-Boyfriends

2009-01-18T20:10:00.000-08:00

Today I found out that most of my ex-boyfriends are gay. Hmmm. Something I said?

We won't even discuss that one of my ex-girlfriends is now a man.

I rock.

WOOOOO HOOOOO

2009-01-18T19:39:00.000-08:00

I Heart Troy Palamalu. I'm even thinking of learning how to spell his name.

GO STEELERS.

PS "The L Word" sucks enough not to devote an entire post to it. I don't heart Ilene Chaiken and refuse to learn how to spell her name.

Battlestar Galactica

2009-01-17T07:06:00.000-08:00

Anyone else out there a "Battlestar Galactica" geek? Anyone understand how many frackin' cylons were actually revealed last night. I remain confused. But they tell me all will be revealed. Revealed like "The X Files" or revealed like "The Sixth Sense"? Gods, please let me understand...

Be aware, there'll probably be a similar post about "L Word" on Monday morning.

Perhaps I do need to start training again. Nah, it's too frackin' cold.

Plane Lands in the Hudson River

2009-01-15T13:51:00.000-08:00

Crazy news out of NYC today:

www.nydailynews.com/news/2009/01/15/2009-01-15_us_airways_airplane_crashes_in_hudson_ri.html

Did I mention we flew USAir to LaGuardia this weekend?

Brrrrr.

Steelers

2009-01-13T08:01:00.000-08:00

How much fun was the 2nd half of the Steelers-Chargers game on Sunday (for Steelers fans, of course)?

Mom & I watched it together & boy did we have a good time.

In the entire 3rd quarter, the Chargers had the ball for 17 seconds and had one offensive play.

Glad I missed the 1st quarter. To make up for that, I watched the 3rd quarter twice. I love Tivo.

NYC Birthday

2009-01-13T06:59:00.000-08:00

Hi!

Anita & I just got back from a long weekend in the Big Apple. We found great airfare and decent hotel rates, so off we went.

We got in Friday afternoon and took the bus & subway from LaGuardia. Don't think we'll bother with that again, though it was an interesting experience and we were very glad we packed light for the weekend. People were very polite, even when they were fighting, which is definitely what I experienced in my NY life. The bus driver was funny and was able to keep people pretty calm in a very crowded and diverse bus.

We checked in to the Best Western President on 48th & Broadway & walked around some before seeing "Forbidden Broadway". We had reservations at the "Bull & Bear" after the show, so we didn't want to eat much. Grabbed the best hot dogs ever from a street vendor (yes, I know this is not a sound decision, but we were hungry and it was my birthday weekend, so I got all the comfort food I could eat).

We enjoyed "Forbidden Broadway". The cast of 4 were very talented as they lampooned current & past Broadway musicals. I especially enjoyed "Young Frankenstein" (and the tune "Putting up with Shit" sung to the tune of "Putting on the Ritz"), "The Little Mermaid" who just wanted to dance but now has no feet, and all the impersonations the cast did quite well.

We had a very nice dinner at what is reportedly Rachel Maddow's favorite restaurant. We stopped by Rockefeller Center looking for Rachel, but didn't see her at 30 Rock or at her favorite restaurant. Very sad. Service wasn't great, but the waiter made up for it by giving us a free drink. We left the restaurant very happy.

Saturday morning we bundled up and tried to figure out what shows to see. After asking some TKTS workers, we were able to buy "Rush" seats for evening performance of "Pal Joey". That means we got $90 tickets for $25. I love NY. We then went back to TKTS to get matinee tickets. I was torn between "Speed the Plow" and "The Fantastiks". I was leaning toward "StP" and even went to their box office to see if they had Rush seats (only for students) while Anita waited in line. When I returned to the line, that's when the NY everyone else knows reared its ugly head. Since we got such great advice earlier from a TKTS worker, I asked another one if she'd seen either of the shows we were considering. She recommended a 3rd show, "Perfect Crime", which we bought.

After securing the day's theater tickets, we hustled down to Madison Square Garden. No, not to watch the Rodeo, which was in town, but to find the one White Castle restaurant in mid-town Manhattan. We froze our tootsies off walking from the subway to the restaurant, but enjoyed those warm, square burgers. We were running a bit behind (and were still cold), so we grabbed a cab back to 49th St & the play.

I'm very sorry to report on "Perfect Crime", but much like "Jethro Throws a Triathlon", the public must be warned. This show has been running for 21 years. It is the longest running ripoff in the theater (not just NY). Evidently, most people fall for this awful show at least once. Be warned. There are NO redeeming qualities to this play.

When we arrived, the usher told us we didn't want the seats we had. He said he'd "hook us up". He escorted us to the middle of the 2nd row. I'm now certain this was so we would feel awkward in walking out. I regret to say that we didn't walk out. Anita did ask at intermission if I wanted to leave. Foolishly, I still wanted to know how it turned out. Dumbass. I got punked on my birthday. The lead, who has been in the role for 21 years, was horrible. The play was stupid, inane, pedantic. The set was pedestrian. There was no direction.

The best part of the entire experience was talking to the other people in the audience at intermission. One fool had mentioned prior to the start that he'd seen the show once before, 20 years ago. All he remembered was that he liked it. We cross-examined him at intermission (We included folks from other rows joining the conversation) and he was pretty apologetic to his companion and even to the rest of us!

After "Perfect Crime" and filing the police report for theft of our time & money, we walked around a bit in the light snow. The Macy's windows were already covered up, so Anita has yet to see the Macy's Christmas windows, but we had a good time just seeing Broadway & surrounding area. When we went past Rockefeller Center Friday night, the Christmas tree was still up, but was not lit - I'm pretty sure the tree was taken down while we ate dinner, because it was gone on Saturday.

We had dinner at Ray's Pizza, which did not hold the special edge it has in the past. Maldini's pizza on the corner of Forest Hill & Belt Blvd, just south of the Boulevard Bridge serves great NY style pizza. Since we have this 1-2 times per month, Ray's just isn't a unique treat for us anymore.

"Pal Joey" was OK. Pretty unremarkable. I believe the lead was sick and off his game, since he'd gotten some outstanding reviews. He was fine. Stockard Channing & Martha Plimpton stole the show for me. They both were in great voice and I enjoyed their comedic timing & songs greatly. Unfortunately, they weren't on stage nearly enough. It was a great show for $25. I'd have been disappointed had we paid more.

After the show, we were walking to Broadway and went past the stage door. There's Stockard, about to sign autographs. We whipped out our Playbills & she signed. I told her that I'd seen her in "They're Playing Our Song". I didn't mention that it was 20 years ago. I told her she hadn't lost a step and she giggled like the schoolgirl I was last time I saw her. That was a lot of fun.

We walked around some more and I ate a Carvel Ice Cream cone. Note to self: don't eat ice cream outside when it's snowing. Brrrr. But I enjoyed eating all the things I remember from childhood, though I didn't get any NY bakery cookies this trip.

We came home Sunday afternoon without incident. We have decided that since we got ripped off with "Perfect Crime", we will come back to NYC in the next month or two. Prices are cheap & tickets are available right now, so we should strike while the iron is hot. Besides, it's like falling off a horse - I feel I've been mugged by this show, so I need to get right back into Broadway to overcome my fear!

All in all, it was a lovely trip.

IMAZ Comment

2008-12-16T14:57:00.000-08:00

I've started telling everyone I came in second at Ironman Arizona.

From Last.

Sometimes, it may be hard to hear that last part.

This makes me smile every time. I love a good funny.

Christmas Light Run/Walk

2008-12-15T06:16:00.000-08:00

What a wonderful idea - getting exercise while enjoying the lights of the season. Anita & I decided to run the 4 mile loop. We got a late start, but caught up with the walkers while they were still on Willow Lawn Drive. We said our hello's & started our run....which lasted until we got to Cathy D's house, where I was mesmerized by football on the big screen and reminded that I was missing my Steelers (woohoo, go Big Ben).

The walkers caught up to us at Cathy's and when Sally found a monster in an upstairs bedroom, I knew we had to stay and protect these folks! OK, it was just a dog, but that was one biiiig dog. We didn't actually make a conscience decision to walk from then on out, but visiting with everyone was too much fun to want to run. We were very lucky that the weather was extremely mild and I never got cold while we were out.

We had some challenges trying to follow directions in the dark, but the lights we wore to protect us from traffic were almost bright enough to read by.

We caught the runners (OK, they were stopped and reading directions). And it was great to see them. We even beat them back to ASK (there may have been a small mileage difference, but it was definitely under 100%). We had serious motivation to make it back as there were instructions not to pee on the neighbors' lawns.

It was fun to follow the lights (instead of the directions) and great to catch up & enjoy a laugh with trigirls. The new space for ASK is lovely and will be very comforting to the families.

Thanks to everyone who contributed to a lovely evening and I hope next year's can be scheduled so that Annn cannn attend.

IMAZ 08 Part II

2008-11-30T07:06:00.000-08:00

On my way to pick up my bike, 6 volunteers slather sunscreen on me. 6. It pays to be alone in the changing tent. Except that they didn't get my face! Weird. I think what hurt most this week were my nose & lips. My nose got chapped from the 10 hours it ran & I wiped it on my arm or my sleeve (I think my nose ran faster than I did). Guess snot rockets aren't as disgusting as all that, but I tried it once & I can't manage it. I did get snotted on by a Pro. Not something I want to collect for memorabilia. But I managed not to heave afterward, unlike the last time. Sorry, didn't know I was going to get gross there, I would have issued a warning.

Anywhoo, I got my bike & headed out. Another fairly long run to the mount line, really want to know where this was deducted from the 140.6 miles. I had a very hard time getting my legs moving. I was so cold. I kept telling myself that if I pedaled faster, I'd warm up sooner, but it was difficult to pick up the blocks of ice that were my legs & feet. I did hear Coaches Mark & Blake in my head telling me to stay in an easy gear & spin.

The ride was fairly uneventful. Since it's a 3 loop course, I got passed by most or all people still in the race. I figured I was ahead of the people who quit in the swim or didn't make the cut off (like my kayaker said, I wasn't last), so I held onto that and tried to stay ahead of the people that started the bike behind me. I have no idea how successful I was, but I didn't finish the bike last.

I saw Brad, Tammy & Heidi coming back in as I was heading into what felt like a major headwind on the first lap. I think it was Heidi who yelled that coming back was much better than heading out, so I put my head down & tried to focus. Between the wind and the little hill, I was going as slow as 7.5 mph in the last bit of the 19 mile loop outward, but as soon as I hit the turn, I was up to 23 with little effort. That was great.

So the thing that cost me 14 minutes, which I promised to tell you in Part I, was that I had to pee. A lot. The desert air was as advertised, extremely dry, and I felt thirsty all day. The first rule of dehydration is if you feel thirsty, you are already dehydrated, so I kept trying to avoid that. I'm now pretty sure that this rule isn't quite true in the desert. Wish I'd learned that lesson earlier. I probably stopped 5-8 times on the bike! What a buzzkill. With the drop in momentum, I think those stops killed my time. Not that I'm complaining - I own 17:14 and, if you want to get technical, it's about the only thing all day I did like a racehorse. It's just weird - on the 100 mile Eastern shore ride, I only peed once. Of course, Mark told me I wasn't drinking enough at the time. Guess I missed out on the happy medium thing.

On the 2nd loop, my family drove out about 10 miles & hooted & hollered at a water stop. It was great to see & hear them. I didn't stop & by the time they got the car turned around, I hit the turnaround & was heading back. They were impressed that my time on the 2nd lap was much-improved from the first lap - it helps when you're thawed out. The wind was also a lot different for the 2nd lap. Going out, there was very little wind, but heading back in, there was a headwind. Weird to be going downhill, but not picking up much speed. I stayed in aero & made it back before the 2nd cut off of the day - with 35 minutes to spare - my best result all day.

As I was crunching numbers on the 2nd loop, figuring I needed to have a better lap to make the 1st bike cutoff, I finally figured out that the cutoffs were getting tighter. Uh oh. 3:30pm for the beginning of the 3rd loop, but only 1 hour 45 minutes to make it back out to the turnaround and then only 1.5 hours to get off my bike! The wind on the 3rd lap out was pretty light, but extremely variable. I felt headwind & crosswind & figured I had tailwind, but never felt it. I just moved those pedals as fast as I could, changing gears regularly. I kept glancing at my watch and knew it was going to be close at the turn. I think I may have burned out a little getting there. With just a mile to go, my watch said 4:12....holy crap, 3 minutes to go a mile. Should be easily doable, but it is the steepest part of the course. I stood on the pedals. That's when I remembered my @#)&@()*# watch was fast. I made the turn with 7 minutes to spare, according to the great volunteers who were cheering me.

Let me pause a minute for the volunteers. There were people out on the bike course who were out there ALONE for 8 hours (OK, alone except for 2000+ bikers). Nothing really required for some of them to do - one even had no chair. Every time I went by - either going out or coming back - they had encouraging words. They were inspiring. I felt the most sorry for these folks (you may ask who else I felt sorry for - I'll give you a guess). The rest stop volunteers - holy cow - I can't imagine how sore they were the next day - after holding up their wares for bikers to grab. I know I came in a little hot on some of them and I'm afraid I may have been a little rough getting my nutrition from some of them. But they kept on holding it out there. One race complaint - they ran out of bananas at the start of my 2nd bike lap. Bananas were a huge part of my nutrition plan. They're loaded with good stuff, easily digestible and make you feel like you're eating real food. I had to replace this with a lot of gu on the bike, which isn't so easy to eat when you're pedaling for your life like I was. That's the one thing I wish was different

about the race - I think this affected my 2nd lap of the run.

Funniest things I saw on the bike - 1) a racer riding a cruiser bike - he came in directly ahead of me on the bike, but he was miles ahead of me on the first lap, so I know I made up some ground. Until I realized I did have a better bike time than he did, I wasn't so amused.

2) a water bottle still in the bottle cage. You could really get some great gear if you can get out on the first few miles of the bike course after everyone heads out. 3) a can of SKOAL smokeless tobacco. It was right in the middle of the road and really looked like a biker had dropped it as he was pulling out a pinch.

Favorite race bib name on the bike - "Agnitch". I don't think she's from around here.

I never saw Som or Melissa during their entire race. I thought sure I'd see Melissa as she was wearing a bright yellow race jersey with a skull & crossbones. Guess she just flashed by as she finished in 11 hours & change. What a superstar.

Not sure how much I made the final bike cut off by, I knew I was going to make it & that I had to hurry to get out on the run to make the next cut off. I had a great transition, even though I stopped to pee AGAIN. I took the time to roll my legs out, which was good since they were pretty tight. Changed my shorts, socks & shoes & grabbed some pretzels and water & I was off.

I had entered transition with a girl named Chris who asked me to wait for her to start the run. Wait? I don't think so. I hollered at her that I was sure she'd catch up (she had a runner's body) & off I went. We ended up run/walking most of the first lap together & crunching more Ironman Math. We figured that we had the 10:15pm cut off well in hand, but I was w

orried about midnight right off. She kept assuring me we had it in the bag, even if we did a fastwalk for the entire marathon. I knew something was off with this, but couldn't put my finger on it. The challenge with doing Ironman math during the Ironman is the battle with oxygen deprivation.

Anyway, we had interesting conversation. One of the first things she said to me was that she's a Christian. Hmmm. I have no problem with that, I just found it curious it was the first thing she told me. One of the first things I said to her in response was that I am gay. Well, at least that kept us walking fast. I explained to her that I never had a choice about being gay & we had a pretty nice conversation about it. She did not appear to believe that I was going to hell because of who I love. Of course, I don't much care what she thought since Anita is the best person on this planet - I don't worry about hell due to my love for her. I worry a little about her loving me as her taste in women will not be getting her into heaven! But I try to be good!

The next subject she mentioned was that she worked for the Department of Defense and thank goodness Obama couldn't cut that. Oh boy. I told her that in the interest of full disclosure, I'm a bleeding heart liberal and would have voted for Obama twice, except that as a bleeding heart liberal, I believe in one person one vote. That was another several mile conversation.

The best thing about my first lap was playing leapfrog with Tammy. It was great to see her for a few miles. I used her as my permission to walk, knowing full well that Tammy is fast. But she was struggling a little and walking some. So I was able to run to get to her and then walk. She'd start running, then walk for awhile and I'd be able to catch her again. This didn't last long as I said, Tammy is fast. But it was great to just have a friendly face that was more than a blur. She looked strong, even though she wasn't feeling great at that time in her race. I was dreading the 3rd lap when I knew I'd be pretty lonely on the course.

The run course was weird. About 8.7 mile loops that were mostly on concrete, but also included EVERY SINGLE OTHER surface you can imagine. We had grass, dirt, rubber, pavement, gravel & big rocks. We had brightly lit areas and intensely dark & cold areas. We had straight up hill and straight down hill. I did not care for the run course. Not at all. I feel it was unsafe in areas - I think it unconscionable that steep hills were in pitch black. I was fortunate to keep my footing in all these areas, but I feel certain that others were not so lucky.

Anyway, I lost Chris just after the first lap as I had to pee again and our agreement was that she would speedwalk as fast as she could until I caught up running. Well, I really wasn't feeling well at this point. A little woozy, a little heavy on my feet. I was getting afraid that I did not have the nutrition in me to make it another two laps. I saw my family & they were really worried that I wasn't going to make the cut off (good thing to worry about). Fortunately, I must have still looked pretty good, because that was all they were worried about. I ate a gu & some chicken broth & stopped to have my two biggest blisters cared for. How do you get blisters right on the balls of your feet? Very annoying.

Ironman chicken broth is the most important thing you can consume during an Ironman. In a 3 loop course, I learned which water stops had too hot broth, which had diluted broth & which ones were juuuust right.

I didn't get to run much in that second lap and it was all I could do to keep walking. Forget speed, though I didn't really forget it as I kept my eye on my watch. I just kept thinking - how can I not finish this blasted race I've been at for all this time and that I NEVER want to do again. Will I be able to let this dream go? Screw that, just hurry and you won't have these issues to deal with...but I knew that AT BEST, it was going to be close.

That 2nd lap was rough. I saw Jody in the beginning of it and she told me Heidi was about 10 minutes behind me, finishing her second lap. Heidi caught up to me with about 3 miles left in h

er race. She looked great & she was a great boost to my energy. I started to run. We were together for merely minutes, but it was really wonderful to spend just those few minutes with her.

I made that last interim cut off by about 20 minutes. That left me 2 hours +/- 5 minutes to run about 9 miles....Normally an easy task. But I couldn't run more than 300 yards at a time before I lost my breath & had to walk. It sucked yet it was OK. I had time to get used to the idea that I wasn't going to make it. I took inventory of my day. I tried to run. I ran. I walked. I peed (like a racehorse - the only thing I did fast all day). I took in nutrition. I kept going. I saw my family. Words can not express my gratitude for their support. They had a much harder day than I did. In the few minutes I saw them every 2 hours, I didn't get to really convey that I'd done the math. I knew the time. I was pushing as hard as I dared (they tried to push me a little harder as they knew I needed 12 minute miles in that last lap). I didn't get to convey that I was OK. Spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically. I wanted that damn cactus finisher's medal. I wanted the tattoo. Hell, I just wanted my frickin' name on the finishers list. Not to be. That blows.

David came about a mile out to finish the last bit with me, which was great. I think he was trying to get me to hit warp speed so we could go back in time. We were together when the clock struck 12. He pointed out to me that it was still only 11pm where he lives. I love my brother very much and that time we spent was very special to me.

Sean & Melissa joined us with about a 1/2 mile left. How sweet of them to come back to help support me in my rather lengthy finish. Fortunately, Melissa was able to get a full night's sleep between her Ironman finish & mine! Melissa even offered to loan me her finisher's medal.

17:14:19. The time it takes to reach the promised land. I had plenty of time to get used to the idea that I wasn't going to make the cut off. Somewhere in the dark, in the hills, I made my peace with it. Unfortunately, my family didn't know where I was at mentally. Based on my Brazil washout, Anita could only expect a couple hours of sobbing. But not this time. Whether I finished or "finished", I know I completed the proscribed course and I did my best. I'm proud of the accomplishment.

And here's the fun part. I don't know what special sauce the IMAZ race organizers were on at a few minutes after midnight on November 24th, but they gave me a finisher's medal, hat & shirt. Then they (the race organizers) gave me a beautiful bouquet of flowers!

I felt like I had won the race. And I think I did.

But I'm not doing this again. I thought it all day long. I thought it all year long. I suck at this. I mean suck at each of these sports individually. My best event in triathlon is transition & if you include peeing in that, then I suck at that too. So I got a little less sucky this year. I got a little faster. But it is pretty demoralizing to continually practice a sport you are not good at. No talent. None. I do not have the body structure for anything but changing clothes. I am at best 5'2". I have poor lung capacity and my heartrate never gets below 80.

I'm not making excuses. Not intending to anyway. I could have missed fewer workouts. I could have run my half mile repeats better. I could have had gait analysis done. I could have gotten a bike that may have given me a mph faster. I could have worn a sperm helmet (but on me, that really would have been ludicrous). I could have eaten better & gotten more sleep. Hell, I could have run on the 2nd lap until I collapsed. I chose none of these things.

Because it's reality. I've dealt with it. I suck at triathlon and I do not enjoy most workouts. It shows. I'm happy as long as we're all talking before a long ride or run or afterward, I love it. It's during that I struggle with. So, I'm officially retired from long distance triathlon. I may do some indoor biking & I may do some strength training at Maramarc. Or show at some TriGirl fundraising function, but I have a new triathlon challenge. I like to call it "golf". Drive - chip - putt BABY! I'm good at it and my physiology doesn't work against me.

I love you all and I wish you all the best. I have enjoyed chatting with you during workouts and I'll miss seeing you at swimming and chatting on the forum. I'll be supporting you from afar and don't be surprised to see me volunteering at one or two of your races. I'll be watching & cheering!

If you ever want to grab a cup of coffee or hit a little white ball around, shoot me an email! Please keep in touch.

IMAZ 08

2008-11-25T08:13:00.000-08:00

So much to write, it's difficult to think where to begin. Guess I'll begin at the end, jump to the start and end in the middle. Yeah, that's it.

Players in the story:

Anita - IronSpouse/Sherpa Extraordinaire

David & Karen - Brother & sister-in-law and single day IronFan ticketholders currently living in Los Angeles

Mom - IronShy - wants her daughter to have no part of this sport, especially this distance. Was offered single day, complementary IronFan ticket and declined wholeheartedly. Very supportive, but phrase most often uttered in last 12 months is: "this is your last one, right?" Stayed on Ironmanlive.com for record 17:14:19 and could be heard from thousands of miles away when the live video feed cut off at midnight mountain time.

Heidi - Ironman & Trigirl - extra special supporter & Rockstar

Tammy & Brad - Ironmen & Trigirl/boy (man this gender thing is confusing in Ironman)

Som - 60 year old, 6-time Ironman in 2008 alone. I didn't even have the energy to ENTER that many races.

Sean - friend, bike mechanic & fiance to...
Melissa - multiple Ironman & new friend

Jody - newly crowned IronSherpa to Heidi (and all TriGirls at IMAZ 2008). I hear she's available for rent at future Mdot races. Please forward all payments in advance to Heidi.

Online Contingent following by internet & cell - Holy Crap, there are a lot of you. Thank goodness. Debbie, Ronda, Linda, Geoffrey, Joy, Patty and all the supportive Trigirls - I love you all, thought of you often and it helped keep me going (and going, etc.)

On the record, there were 7 cutoffs during the day. I only missed one (insert sad, wistful smile here). The clock said 17:14 as I crossed the line. Now I know how Maxwell Smart felt: "Missed it by that much". Don't get me wrong - I'm still proud and feel I accomplished a great deal. Hell, I took 1 hour, 24 minutes off my only other Iron Distance Race. How many people do you know can say that? And do you want to know what I spent 14 minutes doing? Probably not, but you'll have to read on to find out (but, you've been warned).

The water was cold and crowded for the first 1/4. I was amazed at the draft I got - I was practically doggy paddling (no Coach Annie, I did not bark), but the pack was pulling me forward. I was paddling & not swimming because I was getting a little beat up and trying to save myself some hassle. Not the way I planned it, but the "back" of the pre-race swim pack would have caused me to swim a couple of extra hundred yards. After Brazil, I was having none of extra swim yards....and besides, I'd estimated where the back of the pack would end and tried to park there, but people kept stopping behind me. I kept looking back to see more & more people line up - only good news was that Brad & Tammy were two of them, so we got to chat a moment before the gun. (Told you I was going to tell this tale from the inside out). Anyway, as I was doggy paddling and still getting beat on, I tried to keep Ironman Shawnie in my thoughts as she pushed people off her during IMFL. It helped a bit, but I did not laught to myself as she did! As a super-slow swimmer, I had some elbow room after the first 1/4, so there's the consolation prize - 30 minutes in I had some space.

Fun swim moments for me:

race volunteer standing on a surfboard with a paddle - I told him I'd tell everyone back home that the swim was so bad, I thought I saw someone walking on water. I almost started hollering, "I'm coming, Elizabeth" and grabbing my chest, but you'll only get that reference if you're as old as me.
taking a minute (while still swimming) to talk with my family. They looked refreshed after their 3/4 to 1 mile hike to find me. Aren't they lucky I'm slow so they didn't have to run to keep up?
Using my standard line on my own personal kayaker who was with me most of the way - "have you seen my car?" This guy was great. Hollered support, stayed far enough away not to be a nuisance. I remember one thing he said was "let me know if you get too cold." I probably stopped swimming at that. I looked at him and asked "so, what can you do if I get too cold?" He gestured to the back of his kayak. "Thanks, but I ain't that cold." Near the last turn for home at about 200 yards, I asked if he'd be joining me for the bike & run. Unfortunately, he'd only brought his kayak.

I finally found a groove at the turnaround and swam back much faster than going out (in my mind anyway). It was cold. I mean colder than a mother-in-law's heart (any mother-in-law, no one I know specifically, it's a damn simile or a metaphor or an analogy or something. Whatever, just get over it). I got cramps in both calves, but was able to just calm down and work them out while continuing my progress.

After the last turn toward the stairs, there were kayakers, surfers and swimmers everywhere. It was weird. I was wondering if I'd wandered into a water parade, but knew from the temperature that I wasn't in Miami. Everyone was yelling at us to push it. Yelling. At. Us. Didn't care for the yelling. Much prefer the supportive scream. Last thing I heard before I was flung up onto dry land by two buff volunteers was my kayaker telling me I wasn't last. Ok, cool, but I want to stay "not last", so I have to bolt.

I did not realize how long the run from the swim end to the changing tent was. I mean, it was right there. Like 15 feet away. But no. We had to run what felt like 1/2 mile carrying wetsuit, swim cap, goggles, earplugs, dropping stuff along the way and not caring. Seeing Anita & David & Karen. I've seen some video and I know they were cheering loudly, but I didn't hear or see them until I was right in front of them.

Then a great volunteer hands me my swim to bike bag to add to my load. At this point, I'm wondering if this race may be more than 140.6 - perhaps they've trimmed some off the run to make up for it (no, they did not). Perhaps this run is to allow you to feel your feet and hands again (no, I did not). Perhaps Ironman is just cruel (yes, indeed). After another 100 yards of parcel carrying, another volunteer takes all my stuff and I can really start running for the changing tent - she schleps all my stuff. That'll make you feel like a rockstar, let me tell ya.

One pretty daggone quick change & I run for the bike - only a couple of hundred yards to the timing mat, but then another 100 yards to the mount line - I ask you - DOES THIS COUNT ANYWHERE IN MY 140.6??? I want a recount. Seriously. Please?

OK, sorry, I have to stop here, I'm beat. I have so much more to tell and thanks to my sherpa, lots of great pics & even a little video to share.

Last Long run before IMAZ

2008-10-26T16:51:00.000-07:00

I took a mental health holiday from work on Friday - as in, if I didn't take off, my mental health might take a holiday. I decided to take the opportunity to get in one of my weekend workouts on Friday so that I could have some actual weekend time off. Upon waking Friday, I decided that I really wanted to get the 2.5 mile swim over with. Packed my bags and decided to check the weather...Saturday's forecast was for constant rain with scattered thunderstorms and a 15-20 mph wind. Hmmmm. I immediately ate a bit more for breakfast, changed clothes, grabbed my ipod, packed some Gu (otherwise known as rocketfuel) and Propel in my camelback & started on my way.

I planned to run from my house, across the Lee Bridge to Franklin St to the Downtown Y, then west on Franklin to Maramarc on Fitzhugh/Staples Mill, back to the Y, back to Maramarc and then home any way I saw fit.

At the Eastern shore 100 mile ride, I counted presidential election signs (Obama won about 20 to 13). I did the same thing on my 22 mile run (of course not double-counting when I backtracked on my course - that would be too much like Ohio in '04 or Florida in '00). Obama won 104 to 26 to 1 (Ron Paul). At one point the score was 7 to 0 to 1! Yes, I ran through VCU, but most of the signs I saw were on Monument Avenue. I expected to see a lot of McCain signs there, but didn't. Let me be partisan for just a moment: WOO HOO! Score one for equality, intelligence, knowledge, the good guys and PEACE. I'm not saying McCain isn't a good guy. He is. I just think he lost his way on the road to the election (by way of Wasilla and wanting to win too badly).

So perhaps the overwhelming victory in signage spurred me on to a great run where I felt good the entire time (pain yes, but not the "Hi Sweetheart, can you come get me" kind of pain I have often felt on long runs).

Perhaps it was running into indoor cycling & Ironman Carlton Hines in VCU land. We both took a timeout from our day to catch up. I had followed Carton's race at Ironman Louisville back in August, but hadn't seen him since. It was great to get the details in person. And it was really great to get his best wishes on my upcoming Ironman Arizona (IMAZ). Carlton even dropped me an email later in the day to wish me luck. I'm happy to say I beat the email home (though he may have had a long day of classes)!

Shit! I just went back & checked when the email was received and I didn't really beat it home. To quote Anneurysm: Fuckmuffins.

Perhaps I had such a good run because on my 2nd stop at the YMCA, a guy I had seen out running stopped me to tell me he thought I was fast. I'm not fast. Especially not on a long run day. I don't run. I don't jog. I slog. But I pretty constantly move forward and I'm happy with that. He introduced himself (Richard) and asked if I was training for the marathon. No, I don't think he was hitting on me - just stay with me, OK? How cool is it that I got to say, "no, Ironman Arizona". This gorgeous, muscle-man was blown away by little ol' me. That was fun.

Perhaps it was then running into a good friend and former boss, Leslie. She's just become a grandmother and I got to catch up a bit with her too, which I had really wanted to do.

All in all, a great run! Probably because I had some breaks. Probably because the breaks were unexpected bonus breaks and each then gave me something to think about as I continued on my way. Perhaps it was knowing there was leftover steak in the fridge calling my name. Perhaps it was because Anita was out of town 1/2 the day & couldn't come get my sorry ass.

Whatever the reason, I want to take every Friday off to do my long weekend workout! But, I only have ONE LEFT!!!! Holy Taper, Batman!

Jethro Throws a Triathlon - The actual race

2008-10-13T18:43:00.001-07:00

Ok, mostly about the race anyway. I got as decent a night's rest as possible and had biscuits & butter for breakfast as that's as close as I could come to my regular breakfast at the B&B.

Race start, like all Iron distance races I know of is at 7. Jethro told us to be at bike to run transition at 5am to pick up our chips, etc.

I actually learned something from registration. We went to the transition area at 6:15. No race officials were there yet, but they were there no later than 6:30 - I hope no racers really showed up at 5am. We get our race numbers & chips and are told that they have a few swim caps, but if we have our own, that would be better. I brought my own. I get my run gear all set up in a little cubby of the bike racks (there is no numbering system on the racks, but there are only 17 or 18 iron distance racers).

A quick drive over to the water by 6:45 - cutting it pretty close to get the bike set up and wetsuit on, so I'm a little panicky. We look out at a beautiful sunrise over the lake. Just gorgeous. Ok, everything is going to be fine. Why aren't there any swim buoys on the lake? Oh, our swim director locked his keys in the car with the race bouys. Toto, I don't think we're at Ironman anymore.

More bonding with fellow racers. Lots more as the bouys don't get out there until 8am! Everyone's nutrition plan was already completely hosed by the time we got in the water. Oh well.

The 72 degree-advertised water was in the neigborhood of 58, I think - it's not like anyone actually had an official reading, but I KNOW it was colder than IMAZ and it was 61 there. I spent a lot less time in the water at Jethro's and I came out shaking. I actually could not control my arms to get a jacket on. One racer came out in worse shape than I did and can you guess what kind of medical support they had for a hypothermic triathlete? Can you? I don't think you can. Anita tells me they wrapped the guy in a carpet they had in the back of the race van. They didn't even have a blanket!!!

So here are some fun things about the swim itself. As we're waiting in the water for the start, there is some last minute instructions. He couldn't give these friggin' instructions in the hour we were waiting around? He had to wait until we were in the frigid water to mention things? Dumbass. Anyway, he wanted us to stay with the buoys between us & shore at all time because the water was about a foot deep in places and it's deepest right near the bouys. Hmmm. So we should swim into each other for two laps of the course. Perfect. The 18 of us discussed it and decided we'd stay as close to the bouys as possible, but we would keep them on our right at all times, thereby avoiding collisions. Righty Tighty. I'm guessing the water depth (or lack thereof) is one of the reasons I was in the water less - I was forced to walk i

n places I could not physically take a stroke, but it wasn't far - I managed to swim whenever the water was over 2 feet deep and even in some places where it wasn't quite that deep. It was the most boring swim ever, after the start. I could see the bottom most of the way - no, the water wasn't that clear, do you not remember me saying it wasn't deep? Keep up, people. Oh, sorry. Inside voice. I saw not a single fish. No one was near me to talk to after the first minute or two (not even the lonely kayaker). I told Anita it was the worst snorkeling trip I ever took - cold water and no life - not even plant life. The single item of note was a golf ball. So, enough about the swim.

In transition, I was fast. How fast you ask? How do I know, there were only 2 timing mats on the course - one at the bike start and one at the finish line. And not even those times were ever posted on the website. OK, I may still be a little bitter about this race. It's one of many, I suppose. I at least beat the hypothermic guy out of transition, though he passed me about mile 6 of the bike.

The bike. I think I already mentioned that most of it took place on Canadian Highway 1, a two lane where the speed limit is about 55mph (it was fast, OK). I was OK on the bike on this road. Drivers were generally pretty good, pretty respectful (did I mention this was in Canada, so that could account for this observation). About 20-25 miles of the 112 mile bike were on side roads. I think there was a policeman at the first turn, but I could be wrong about that. It could have just been a guy in a reflective vest.

I had a lot of alone time on the bike. Anita did everything she could to visit me often (she logged a lot of miles in our big, red rental truck), but it was 2 laps of a 56 mile course & she was trying to support Debbie in her 1/2 Iron as well. So, in my alone time, I tried to be fast. I tried to slip through the wind. I tried to find race port-a-johns (there was not a single bathroom set up by the race organizers). I tried to think of witicisms to tell my friends when I finished this godawful quest. So here's the best story I came up with to tell you. On the way out of "town" on the first lap of the bike, I passed a dead racoon lying just off the edge of the road. By the time I made it back: 1st attempt) it was nothing but a spine; 2nd) someone had cooked it up for dinner; 3rd) Davy Crockett was wearing it as a hat and finally, my favorite, 4th) someone had stuffed it and stuck a for sale sign on it.

I developed new and not interesting songs. Here's my favorite, sung to the tune of "99 bottles of beer on the wall":

99 miles to go on the bike,

99 miles to go.

You pedal, you pedal, you pedal some more

And there's still 99 fucking miles to go on the bike.

Race organization on the bike: Umm. there was some. Really. There were tables every 18 miles or so. These were normally manned by two teenage boys. They meant well, but it was a long day with little or no instruction for them and even fewer resources. Debbie reports she pulled up at one such stop and wanted gatorade. The kid took her water bottle and started measuring powder into it. Debbie was heard to exclaim, "IT'S A RACE, FOR PETE'S SAKE."

At this point, i don't remember many of my water stops. I was pretty well geared up on my bike, so I had pretty much everything I needed already with me (yes, except for a toilet). I do remember the very nice older couple at the turnaround. Halfway through my second lap, I stopped there to take a breather and I asked what they had to offer. They told me they had oranges. That sounded wonderful, so they handed me an orange to eat on the bike. Not orange slices. An entire orange. I'm not talented enough to steer, pedal, peel a

n orange & not get run over. So I peeled it while I stood there. I took one bite and found it waaayyyy to acidic on my stomach. After spending the time to peel it, I couldn't even eat the blasted thing.

One other thing I remember at a two teenager water stop. As I thanked them for volunteering, they mentioned they were paid volunteers. Ummm. Right. Great. At least that meant they'd most likely stick around. And it gave legitimacy to race expenses that were definitely spared elsewhere.

So about the toilet stops. Anita is amazing. Basically, every time she'd drive by me or to me, I'd holler that I needed a bathroom. Not having many bathrooms (and no scheduled stops) on the race, prevented me from going as much as I felt the need to; I think this helped my race time! Anita would drive ahead and find the next closest store (non-chain mini-marts were all there were). She'd buy some gas or a soda and ask if her friend could u

se the bathroom. Enter me, clomping around in my bike shoes. I love Anita.

I love this Canadian sign that was on the bike course.

When I finally got off the bike, someone had actually racked their bike right over my transition stuff. I was broiling mad. There were several bike racks (no numbering sequence, of course) and only a few competitors, so there's no way that screwing up my stuff was necessary. I racked my bike in a new spot & dragged all my transition stuff to the new place. There was not a soul in transition. Including no fans of any kind. Nobody. I took it as a great sign though - no one expected me in so "quickly". I found out later that was true. I also found out it was Debbie's bike. She'd racked her bike next to my stuff - the wind probably pushed it over. She wanted me to feel like I wasn't alone. Funny.

I felt great to start the run, but I must not have actually been great. In the first mile, I remember deciding that I didn't really need to eat anything more - I'd really eaten a lot on the bike, so I should be good for the run. So, now we know I was delusional. Fortunately, I did carry sports beans with me, but that's all I ate on the entire marathon. Sports beans, water and powerade for 26.2 miles. Moron.

Ran great for 6 miles. Walked the 2 water stops. I'm not sure I ever felt better running off a long bike. Really excited. Mile 6: IT band decides that it never wants to bend again. Naturally, I can bend it, but it hurts like a mother-, well, it hurts too much to run. I stop to stretch and that's when the mosquitoes descend. I had about 10 huge lumps on my neck in seconds. I abandoned the stretching and just did a fast walk to get away from the swarms. I think that's the last time I thought about stopping & stretching.

At this time, Anita passed out bug spray and glow sticks to all folks racing at dusk and later. The race "organizers" had nothing for anyone.

Long story short: I walked 20 miles. Debbie, Ronda & Anita took turns walking with me. It got dark. Pitch black dark. Anita got the rental truck and followed us as we walked the marathon. We passed the one sign that said "race in progress". Anita stopped the truck, picked up the sign and attached it to the truck - by that time I was the only "racer" out there. It sucked, but with the support of my loved ones, I finished. Debbie came up with the Ring of Fire - a yellow glow necklace. She used this to make sure I was staying on the shoulder of the road instead of weaving into the road in the last 2 miles of the race.

I was weaving so badly and feeling so poorly with .2 miles to go that they were trying to get me to eat something. There was a lone nutrigrain bar where the last water stop used to be. I think it was Ronda who yelled from the truck to make me eat it. I heard her say "Nutrigrain" and my stomach rebelled. I hollered "don't talk about nutrigr..." That's when I threw up. That's right. I puked with .2 miles left. Lovely. Way to finish strong, right?

Many friends and family have asked when I knew I would finish my first Iron distance race. It was right after I got sick. I suddenly felt a lot better and wondered why I had thrown up 5 or 10 miles earlier when I started feeling ill. For 140 miles, I knew that lots of things could interfere in accomplishing my goal. With .2 miles left, I knew I could crawl.

So, I walked across the line in a time of 18:37, a marathon time of right on 8:37! We practically had to measure it in dog years. One race guy waited for me to finish. He handed me a medal that didn't even say "triathlon" on it. It sure as hell didn't say "Iron" nor "finisher". It said "World Endurance Sports".

I thought I'd treasure the medal, but I don't. I treasure the memories and knowing that my friends and family love me a lot.

I treasure my Mom for bursting into tears when I called her to tell her I finished. That was really the first time I found out she was terrified of me participating in this sport. What a trooper.

I treasure Lisa for being so excited for me when we called her the next day. That was great.

I treasure thinking of Johnny Cash & "Ring of Fire" with Debbie. Debbie got sick after she finished her 1/2 Iron race - her first 1/2. Then, even though she didn't feel well, she came out and walked miles with me and when she wasn't walking, she drove or rode in the truck until I finished.

I treasure Ronda. I'm still a little upset about the Nutrigrain bar, but she meant well, and I did feel better afterward. I treasure her friendship & support.

I treasure all the other folks I didn't call that day, but that have been so supportive before & since. I thought of each of you during the race (there are a lot of you, so I'm glad I had a lot of time). I enjoyed listening to the songs each of you selected for me and have enjoyed those memories during runs since that day. I still have that Ipod mix saved on the computer.

Of course, I especially treasure Anita. Her unwavering love and support are critical to my every breath. I can't say enough so I'll stop there.

FYI, I haven't had a sportsbean or a nutrigrain bar since.

Jethro Throws a Triathlon - Prerace Dinner & Registration

2008-10-13T18:42:00.000-07:00

Sorry this is soooo late, but since people still seem interested in last year's crazy race, I'll continue the story...trying to be brief...OK, less long-winded.

Prerace Dinner & Registration

Or, as we like to call it, "where would you like to go eat tonight".

When we get to the town for dinner at 5, we find the restaurant is "Under new ownership" and will open tomorrow. Tomorrow? The race is tomorrow. OK, there are restaurants around. We'll find something. Let's register and then we'll eat.

Registration is running late and won't be available until 7. I'm supposed to be in bed by 7. Ok, fine. We find some other racers and head on over to a hotel restaurant, which happens to be serving and Italian buffet with cook to order pasta. It was decent food and offered a beautiful view of the Harrison Lake (not to be confused with the lake we're swimming in). We met Luke, a professional, off-road triathlete and his Mom. Mom was running the 1/2 and Luke was there for support. They were both very nice and we had a great time with them. We even offered Luke a place to stay if he comes to Richmond for the Xterra again. 2007 at Richmond was his first top 10 finish.

So back to registration - not ready at 7. I'm not sure when it finally opened because what happened next was so appalling. We get into the room for registration and there's one guy sitting there with a laptop. I guess you could also call this the expo, since there were store nearby. No tri stores or running stores, mind you, but you could at least get some ice cream or a bumper sticker.

"The Guy" was our race "organizer" & director, Brent Kamenka. So we go up to "registration". He asks us our names. We give them to him. He says OK, thanks. That's it. That's registration. Naturally, we then had a few questions. Where are race numbers? Where are our timing chips? Where are our race shirts? Swim caps? Packets?

Come to the Bike to run transition at 5am and we'll give you your chips & numbers. WHAT!!!???? Oh, and we want to get everyone hoodies for the race, so we want to get everyone's sizes....yet they didn't ask for our sizes & when I volunteered mine, he didn't even write it down.

Not good.

Next - the actual race.

Jethro Throws a Triathlon - Arrival

2008-10-09T17:40:00.000-07:00

So we arrive in the teeny, tiny town of Harrison Mills, British Columbia, not to be confused with the tourist destination, Harrison Hot Springs, which is 30 minutes down the road. The main business establishment in "town" is The Sasquatch Inn, above. Seriously. We bought a t-shirt to prove it.

Our tri'ing friends, Debbie & Ronda, are bargain-hunters. We've convinced these dear friends that Debbie running her first 1/2 on the same course where & while I'm running my first full Iron is a good idea. Debbie likes a deal, so they decided to stay at the Sasquatch inn for $30 a night. 30 Canadian dollars. The race is on Saturday morning. Their room is above a bar. A bar that has live music on Friday nights. But they splurge and for an extra $10, they don't have to share the bathroom and can actually get a 2nd, adjoining room. We tour their rooms and decide that we like our B&B with the tub in the bedroom. At least we have locks that work...for 10 times the price.

Anyway, we ask the bartender at the Sasquatch what he's heard about the triathlons the next day. Nothing. This is the man who knows everyone and everything. Uh Oh. But I'm sure everything is fine. Fine. No reason to panic.

We drive the bike course. It is not flat as advertised, but when is any course as advertised? OK, I feel pretty good about it, though Anita notices traffic is pretty steady on this two lane road, points out that there is no shoulder, just a ditch and beyond the ditch is either a mountainside or the ravine & on down to the lake. Hmmm.

We go to the gorgeous-looking lake that's supposed to average 70 degrees. I stick a toe in. Anita starts a bonfire on the beach in order to stop my shivering. The good news is we find several other folks who are running the race and discuss what we've heard & learned. We bond.

We learn which restaurant the pre-race dinner is in and where registration is. Excellent, since the website wasn't updated when we had internet access and we had no idea where to go.

Next: Dinner & registration

Jethro Throws a Triathlon - Prelude - The Decision

2008-10-09T17:05:00.000-07:00

Told in hindsight, because I suck at iambic pentameter.

If you get "Ironstruck", you have only three choices: volunteer at the MDOT race the year before you plan on becoming an Ironman, work on your typing speed and pray you are quickest If there are any internet spots available, or race a non-MDOT Iron Distance race.

The volunteer thing wasn't such a necessity the year I decided to do Ironman. Or at least, that's what we thought. As I was desperately trying to type my application AND stay connected to active.com when IM Florida 2007 registration opened in November 2006, the race filled up. I was ignorant. I didn't really understand the "community fund" where for a mere $1000, I could buy my way into the race. I wish I had listened more closely to Shelley.

I was sad to miss out on the race that my friends were doing. But surely there was an Ironman race available for 2007. I looked. Hmmmm. Not a lot of choices. OK, here's one: Bigfoot. Weird name, but website looks good, no race cap, no time limit, entry fee in Canadian dollars (at the time, that was a good thing for a US citizen), beautiful area 1 hour west of Vancouver, Canada. That'd be a great vacation area after the race. I emailed the race organizer with questions and got a great & fast response. I signed up.

A year of training. A year of planning. A year of Ironman math (if I can finish the bike in 7 hours and I run 12 minute miles for the first 1/2 marathon, and the train leaves the station heading south at 2 mph...). I hate Ironman math. For me, it always comes out to 17:04. doh! A year of Google Earth, trying to prove that the Bigfoot website doesn't lie: the water is 70 degrees, crystal clear, the bike is 100% flat with no wind (as it is entirely within a valley between mountains), and the run is also flat. The volunteers are plentiful and will even pick wild blackberries to serve to the runners - never will you find a friendlier group of people.

This next sentence may astound you. People are not always forthright.

But, I was committed. I trained from December through August. I had a great training group. I didn't complete every planned exercise. Far from it. But I trained more than I ever had, by far. I went to Canada nervous, but as prepared as I was every going to be.