Funny thing happened on the way to triathlon

I was contemplating Ironman Texas 2011; I admit it. An early season tri would eliminate 90% of the awful summer training in Richmond. It would allow me to continue to play nearly as much golf as I want to in 2010. It would enable me to get the 14 minute monkey off my back and perhaps to even get on with my post-IM life. I thought I might even have company on the race and in training.

Then, I was reminded that my shoulder hurts and that I should see a Dr about it before shelling out $600. Then I was told that I would not have the company I seek on the race. Not in 2011 anyway.

Then I was reminded that we have a family wedding to attend in Florida the following weekend which may make vacation time limited (but who wants to vacation in Houston anyway).

Then I was reminded that I pretty much suck at swimming, biking & running.

Then I was reminded that I pretty much hate same.

But that monkey is still clawing. I received permission to do the race. NO, you don't need to know from whom. But please don't tell my mother I'm considering it. I think she knows, but she's pretending blissful ignorance and that works for us.

I've looked at the race website every day for a week. I've got the phone number for a great Dr for my shoulder and certainty that an appointment would be expedited (oh yeah, did I mention my health insurance currently carries a $6000 deductible I really was planning on not spending)?!

Anita wants me to lose the monkey. She doesn't find it attractive, though she tries to hide that fact. She'd like me to do IM TX 2011.

And then yesterday, we went to support a friend at a tri. I was overcome with a sense of, well, not calm, exactly, but a sense of "whatthefuckwasIthinkingIhatethisfuckingsport", which pretty much is as close as I ever get to calm. I was certain the monkey was gone.

I looked at ironmantexas.com again today.

Is there a 12 step group for this?